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TSG: Wisconsin Man Pleads Guilty To Couch Sex


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I couldn't find whether I posted about this last year, but here's an update regardless:

 

Wisconsin Man Pleads Guilty To Couch Sex

Perp was caught in illicit tryst with discarded love seat

JUNE 24--A man who was caught last year having sex with a couch discarded on a Wisconsin street pleaded guilty this afternoon to a public lewdness charge.

 

During a hearing in Waukesha County Circuit Court, Gerard Streator, 47, copped to a misdemeanor charge stemming from September’s illicit curbside encounter.

 

...

 

Officer Ryan Edwards reported spotting “a subject leaning over the couch facing down and it looked like he was having sexual relations with someone on the couch.” Edwards added that he “could see the male’s hips thrusting up and down on the couch.”

 

When Edwards approached and yelled, “What are you doing?,” Streator dismounted the love seat and ran away. As the suspect fled, Edwards reported, he “could see that the defendant’s penis was erect.”

 

The officer concluded that Streator--who was alone--“had been thrusting his pelvic area against the cushions and trying to sexually gratify himself by rubbing his penis between the two cushions.”

 

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I also couldn't find the original thread from 2007 about the guy having sex with his bicycle, but here's a related story:

 

Masturbating man caught molesting bicycle

 

A masturbating man has been caught on film rubbing himself against the seat of a bicycle, whose owner had grown tired of finding the tyres punctured and set up a camera.

 

The film, published by the Kvällsposten daily, shows how a hooded man approaches the bicycle, punctures the tyres and then proceeds to pleasure himself.

 

...

 

Östersund police are investigating whether there is any connection between the recent spate of masturbation bike attacks with similar incidents from 2007.

A 35-year-old man was arrested in 2007 after having slashed the tyres and ejaculated over some 20 bike seats in the city.

The man was sentenced to secure psychiatric care and is reported to have since been released.

 

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The film, published by the Kvällsposten daily, shows how a hooded man approaches the bicycle, punctures the tyres and then proceeds to pleasure himself.

Why did he feel the need to slash the tires before getting busy with the bicycle? Was he worried it would try to escape?

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Every time I see a story like this, I think of a scene. 

 

The new guy arrives in jail.  They dress him, search him, photograph and fingerprint, throw a bunch of blanket and toothbrush and things at him.  And then a guard takes New Guy to his cell.  All the way in, through exercise yard and hallways and doors clanging open and closed.  And all the while, everybody is checking out New Guy. 

 

Finally, New Guy arrives in his cell.  Occupant checks out New Guy.  Cell door clangs shut.  New Guy dumps his things on the bunk. 

 

And then the moment occurs. 

 

"So.  What you in for?" 

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