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Teaching IBM's Watson the meaning of 'OMG'

Getting supercomputers like IBM's Watson to understand slang may be the final frontier in machine intelligence.

FORTUNE -- The scientific test to gauge if a computer can "think" is surprisingly simple: Can it engage in small talk? The so-called Turing test says a computer capable of carrying on a natural conversation without giving itself away can be considered intelligent. So far, no machine has made the cut.


Two years ago, Brown attempted to teach Watson the Urban Dictionary. The popular website contains definitions for terms ranging from Internet abbreviations like OMG, short for "Oh, my God," to slang such as "hot mess."

But Watson couldn't distinguish between polite language and profanity -- which the Urban Dictionary is full of. Watson picked up some bad habits from reading Wikipedia as well. In tests it even used the word "bull****" in an answer to a researcher's query.

Ultimately, Brown's 35-person team developed a filter to keep Watson from swearing and scraped the Urban Dictionary from its memory.

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AIG Is Thinking About Suing the Government for Bailing It Out


It's been almost five years since AIG's stock dropped 60 percent in a day leaving the company doomed to failure, when Uncle Sam swooped in with $182 billion to rescue it. But AIG must have a short memory, because on Monday night news emerged that the insurance company is actually thinking about suing the U.S. government over the bailout that saved it. The board will discuss the idea with shareholders at a meeting on Wednesday.

It's not so much that AIG's mad the government bailed them out. (They wouldn't be around to be mad if it hadn't.) They just wish they'd done it a little bit differently. "The lawsuit does not argue that government help was not needed," The New York Times reports. "It contends that the onerous nature of the rescue -- the taking of what became a 92 percent stake in the company, the deal's high interest rates and the funneling of billions to the insurer's Wall Street clients -- deprived shareholders of tens of billions of dollars and violated the Fifth Amendment, which prohibits the taking of private property for 'public use, without just compensation.'"

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Swiss court wipes slate clean on ancient farm debt

GENEVA (AP) - A Swiss court has wiped out an annual debt that farmers have had to pay the Catholic Church to atone for a crime 655 years ago.

Swiss public broadcaster RTS says a court in the northeastern canton (state) of Glarus ruled that the current farm owner no longer has to pay 70 Swiss francs ($76) each year because Swiss mortgage reforms in the mid-19th century made the practice invalid.

The broadcaster reported Tuesday the court sided with the landowner in a dispute with the church after he refused to make the annual payment for oil and candles.

The payments had been a tradition since 1357, when a man named Konrad Mueller killed a man named Heinrich Stucki. To atone, Mueller promised to always pay to keep an eternal lamp lit.

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Father Hires Virtual Hit Men To Assassinate Son in Online Video Games


From China via Livedoor and Kotaku East comes the tale of a father whose unemployed 23-year-old son was allegedly devoting the bulk of his waking hours to an online war game. As the son's skills grew, he began to find that he could defeat almost all comers—until one day the young man found himself being cut down immediately every time he began the game. After a while, he began to suspect that something was up, and grilled his virtual assassins as to why they were targeting him. Eventually one let slip that he had been hired by the boy's father for just that purpose.

Kotaku East explains:

Unhappy with his son not finding a job, Feng decided to hire players in his son's favorite online games to hunt down Xiao Feng. It is unknown where or how Feng found the in-game assassins—every one of the players he hired were stronger and higher leveled than Xiao Feng. Feng's idea was that his son would get bored of playing games if he was killed every time he logged on, and that he would start putting more effort into getting a job.

The plot apparently failed, as Xiao Feng refused to stop playing the game. But hey, if he keeps at it, maybe one day he can score a gig as an online video game hitman.

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Wuhan hospital opens VIP sex wards furnished with adjustable double bed, sex toys and videos to treat infertility by inspiring sexual passion

A hospital in Wuhan has recently opened VIP patient wards for infertile patients and couples having problems in conceiving babies. The wards are furnished with all necessary furniture and tools for easy and successful sex except condom. Promoted as 'second nuptial chamber', the luxury decoration and furniture in the room are to encourage pregnancy by inspiring sexual passion for the patients.

The luxury wards, dubbed by Chinese media as "sex wards", each has an area of 50 square meters. The standard furnishing includes red lamps, sex toys, automatically adjustable sex double bed and couch, pictures illustrating human genital structure. And sex skill videos, nurse uniform and air hostess costumes are available on request.

Expert will come to bedside to watch and give advice on sex skills

According to a report, expert will come to provide sex skills advice when the potentially infertile couple have sex in the VIP sex ward.

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---------- Post added January-10th-2013 at 11:30 AM ----------

Oh, and this little gem in the article:

According to the sex professor Peng Xiaohui from Huazhong Normal University invited to the press conference, they once treated a couple having fertility problems and the reason why the couple with doctor degree failed to conceive a baby after three years of marriage was found to be that the husband had mistaken the belly button of his wife for her vagina!
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A Fracking Proposal From a Texan


I read your Jan. 3 editorial "New York' s Fracking Phobia" about New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo's hesitation with regard to fracking in New York. Some of us in Texas believe the governor should outlaw fracking in New York. It is a nasty business. In fact, maybe he should outlaw any kind of drilling. It is all dangerous. And we might not mind if every state except Texas outlawed fracking. Well, maybe at least those states whose citizens consider themselves to be intellectually superior, plus Alaska. We need to keep those states pristine, and besides that we need to get prices up to a more reasonable level.

Do not worry about jobs. The ones who want to work can come to Texas. The ones who don't want to work can move to California or call the White House, which will send them some stuff.

Fracking is not the only thing New York should prohibit. It should certainly not allow any refineries, nor any pipelines, nor trucks hauling gas or oil, nor tanker ships. With regard to tankers, particular care should be made to avoid double-hulled tankers, because everyone knows that a double-hulled tanker is twice as dangerous as one with a single hull. And please, no LNG terminals, which would surely attract terrorist bombings and maybe even Iranian missiles.

I have walked the canyons of Manhattan enough to know that the winds are often strong enough to power windmills........


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According to the sex professor Peng Xiaohui from Huazhong Normal University invited to the press conference, they once treated a couple having fertility problems and the reason why the couple with doctor degree failed to conceive a baby after three years of marriage was found to be that the husband had mistaken the belly button of his wife for her vagina!

Great! the shallow end of the gene pool now have lifeguards..

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Puppy thrown at German biker gang

A German student "mooned" a group of Hell's Angels and hurled a puppy at them before escaping on a stolen bulldozer, police have said.

The man drove up to a Hell's Angels clubhouse near Munich, wearing only a pair of shorts and carrying a puppy.

He dropped his shorts and threw the dog, escaping on a bulldozer from a nearby building site.

He was arrested later at home by police. The 26-year-old is said to have stopped taking depression medication.

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Zoo chimp addicted to human porn


Keepers at a Spanish zoo say one of their chimps has become addicted to watching human porn.

Gina's unlikely habit began after a television set was installed in her enclosure at Seville Zoo.

Primatologist Pablo Herreros told El Mundo: "'To enliven Gina's nights, officials decided to install a Freeview television, protected behind glass, and gave her a remote control so she could change the channels herself.

"In the early trials, her keepers visited Gina to check that everything was in order and she did not break the new toy.

"The surprise came when they found that within a few days, Gina was not only using the remote control perfectly well, but that she also chose the porn channel for entertainment, as many of us would have done."

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Online horsemeat burger calculator

A price comparison website has launched an online calculator - so burger fans can work out how many horses they could eat in a lifetime.

It comes after tests by the Food Safety Authority of Ireland found a sample of Tesco Everyday Value Beefburgers contained 29% horse meat.

Tom Packer, founder of MyDeals.com which created the calculator, said: "Based on the calculations we've trotted out, you would need to eat approximately 26,400 burgers to eat the equivalent of one horse, hardly the basis for a stable diet.

Click on the link for the rest

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  • 3 weeks later...

666 on tax form makes man quit job to save soul

A Clarksville man said that he quit his job last week in order to save his soul.

Walter Slonopas, 52, resigned as a maintenance worker at Contech Casting LLC in Clarksville after his W-2 tax form was stamped with the number 666.

The Bible calls 666 the “number of the beast,” and it’s often used as a symbol of the devil. Slonopas said that after getting the W-2, he could either go to work or go to hell.

“If you accept that number, you sell your soul to the devil,” he said.

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The Fifty-Three Dirty Band Names You Can Never Say on the Radio

Actually, it's quite a bit more than 53.

According to a notice posted on the employee bulletin board at Seton Hall University's heavy metal radio station WSOU, uttering any band names or playing any songs with the words "devil," "Satan," "God," "Jesus," or "any other Catholic references that are portrayed in a negative light" will result in suspension.

But to take any guesswork out of which band names aren't appropriate for the airwaves at "Seton Hall's Pirate Radio," the management drafted a list of the 53 dirtiest band names that you can never say on the radio, a la George Carlin's iconic monologue about TV.

The list includes such metal radio staples as Cradle of Filth, Cannibal Corpse, Anal ****, Morbid Angel, and Deicide, but also a bunch of just-fun-to-say-out-loud outfits such as Adolf Satan, Baby Jesus Hitler, Cruci****s, Jesus Chrysler, Smother Theresa, and, of course, Hell-O.

It's all fairly ridiculous Roman Catholic university stuff, but you'll be quick to forgive once you realize that mentioning Nickleback and/or Justin Bieber will result in a DJ's immediate termination.

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Ron Paul Calls on United Nations to Confiscate Domain Names of His Supporters


Earlier today, Ron Paul filed an international UDRP complaint against RonPaul.com and RonPaul.org with WIPO, a global governing body that is an agency of the United Nations. The complaint calls on the agency to expropriate the two domain names from his supporters without compensation and hand them over to Ron Paul.

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Montana TV Station’s Emergency Alert System Hacked, Warns of Zombie Apocalypse

An emergency alert interrupted Montana television viewers as they watched the Steve Wilkos Show Monday, and calmly informed them that "dead bodies are rising from their graves."

The (clearly) bogus alert was quickly pulled off air and replaced with an apology from KRTV — the station that broadcast the message — both on air and online reading:

Someone apparently hacked into the Emergency Alert System and announced on KRTV and the CW that "dead bodies are rising from their graves" in several Montana counties.

This message did not originate from KRTV, and there is no emergency.

Our engineers are investigating to determine what happened and if it affected other media outlets.

Click on the link for the full article and video

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West Palm Beach Man Accused of Illegal Butt Enhancements Arrested Again

Calvin Butler is accused again after fourth alleged victim comes forward, authorities say

For the second time in less than a month, a West Palm Beach man has been arrested on the charge he performed illegal butt enhancements, according to authorities.

Calvin Edward Butler, also known as Tamieka Butler, was arrested Tuesday after a fourth alleged victim came forward claiming they received illegal injections into their buttocks, according to WPTV.


The first alleged victim, a woman, told detectives in December that she received injections from Butler at the El Patio Motel four times between September and October, the report said.

With the victim lying down, Butler would pour out a clear liquid from a Pedialyte bottle, telling the woman it was sterile silicone, the report said. After pouring the liquid into a plastic cup, he filled syringes from the cup which he used to inject into the woman's buttocks, the report said.

Once the injections were complete, Butler would clean any blood or fluid from the skin and use Krazy Glue on the incisions, the report said. The woman was charged $200 per injection session.

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Zhirinovsky calls for limits on smoking, licenses for sex

The leader of the Liberal Democratic Party of Russia and Duma vice speaker Vladimir Zhirinovsky said the future law on tobacco smoking, which the lower parliament chamber is to discuss on Tuesday in its third and final reading, should be much tougher, adding that excessive eating and sex should also be restricted.


“We need eating restrictions. Our people are overfed and too fat. Sex should also be restricted to one time per quarter through issuing licenses, quotas or coupons,” Zhirinovsky added.

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French driver trapped for an hour in speeding 125mph car with no brakes

Frank Lecerf finally came to a stop in a ditch in Belgium when his Renault Laguna ran out of petrol after 200km trip

When Frank Lecerf drove off to do his weekly supermarket shop in northern France, he was not expecting to embark on a high-speed car chase that would force him over the Belgian border and on to the national news bulletins.


The 36 year old was on a dual carriageway on his way to a hypermarket when the car's speed first jammed at 60mph. Each time he tried to brake, the car accelerated, eventually reaching 125mph and sticking there.

While uncontrollably speeding through the fast lane as other cars swerved out of his way, he managed to call emergency services who immediately dispatched a platoon of police cars.

Realising Lecerf had no choice but to keep racing along until his petrol ran out, they escorted him at high speed across almost 125 miles of French motorway, past Calais and Dunkirk, and over the Belgian border.

Puzzled motorists gave way as the high-speed convoy approached. Three toll stations were warned to raise their barriers as Lecerf ploughed through. After about an hour, his petrol tank spluttered empty and he managed to swerve into a ditch in Alveringem in Belgium, about 125 miles from his home, in Pont-de-Metz, near the northern French city of Amiens.

Click on the link for the full article

---------- Post added February-14th-2013 at 11:17 AM ----------


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Man stabbed after refusing to change positions during threesome

A ménage a trois went wrong for prison buddies Ashley Hunter, 33, and Orlando DeWitt, 37, in Fargo, North Dakota last week. According to court records obtained by The Smoking Gun, Hunter pulled a butcher knife from his couch and stabbed DeWitt in the arm after DeWitt refused to switch positions and let Hunter have sex with the female participant.

DeWitt and Hunter were were partying with several female acquaintances Friday night at a bar in Fargo, when they went to Hunter’s home to continue the party with a woman named Leticia. Once there, DeWitt had sex with the woman while she performed oral sex on Hunter.

According to court documents obtained by The Smoking Gun, DeWitt was having sex with a woman named Leticia while she was performing oral sex on Hunter. “Hunter then asked to switch places with Orlando,” the Fargo Police Department report stated. “Orlando told him no and Hunter became upset.”

An argument followed, with DeWitt allegedly calling Hunter a “f----- retard.” DeWitt said Hunter threatened to kill him and said Hunter reached for a 12-inch butcher knife. DeWitt and Leticia fled to a bathroom naked while Hunter ran after them while holding the knife.

“Orlando said he decided to run for the front door,” the police report continues. DeWitt tried to escape and was able to get through the first door, but when he “went to open the exterior door he felt the knife cutting the back of his left arm.”

DeWitt was not seriously injured in the stabbing, and he used Leticia’s phone to call 911. Hunter is scheduled to appear in court March 13 to answer charges related to the stabbing.

Read more: http://www.upi.com/blog/2013/02/14/Man-stabbed-after-refusing-to-change-positions-during-threesome/1911360866370/#ixzz2Kyp7Aji9

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Chubby Checker sues penis app

Chubby Checker is suing the makers of an app that estimates the size of a man's penis for using his name without permission.

The 71-year-old singer, best known for his 1960 hit The Twist, claims the app has associated his name with "obscene sexual connotation".

He is seeking half a million dollars for the "irreparable damage and harm" the app, created for Hewlett-Packard's Palm OS platform, has done to his reputation.

Checker's lawyer Willie Gary said: "This lawsuit is about preserving the integrity and legacy of a man who has spent years working hard at his musical craft.

"The defendants have marketed Chubby Checkers' name on their product to gain a profit and this just isn't right."

The Chubby Checker app, which estimates penis length in both metric and imperial measurements, was reportedly withdrawn in September.

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All that needs to be said is JAPAN.

Wearing Women's Panties On Your Face Is All The Rage In Japan

It's called “Panty Face” and involves schoolgirls wearing women's underwear on their faces. That's it really.

This is Hentai Kamen, "the abnormal super hero," he wears women's underwear on his face and fights crime.


These photos are from a photo book released in Japan that show girls in school uniforms doing every day activities like karaoke...



Kotaku is saying the photo book appears to be a parody, but the line between parody and fetish appears to have been blurred.

Click on the link for more

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Probe into police dog's statement

Police officers in the West Midlands could be in the dog house after a police dog apparently filed a witness statement.

The brief statement, on behalf of police dog Peach, read: "I chase him. I bite him. Bad man. He tasty. Good boy. Good boy Peach."

The 'statement' was signed at the bottom with a print of the Alsatian's pawmark.


Click on the link for the full article

---------- Post added February-19th-2013 at 01:13 PM ----------

Woman, 72, caught having sex in barbecue joint parking lot

SONORA, Calif. (CNN) -- Two senior citizens showed a small town in northern California that nobody is too old to show a lover their affection.

Just make sure it's not in a parking lot -- and definitely not in the middle of the day.

Doc's Smoked BBQ and Burgers in Sonora is known for its great Texas barbecue.

"My favorite, I'd have to say, it's like between the tri tip and the chicken," said owner Rachael Shevlin.

She runs the family restaurant and cooks with love. But it was a different kind of love that caught Shevlin's attention on Tuesday.

It was love making. In the parking lot. In a car. In the middle of the day.

"It gets hot back here and it was, obviously, getting hot out there," Shevlin said.

She went outside and saw a couple celebrating Valentine's Day a little early -- and without any clothes.

When police walked up to the car they didn't find a couple of spring chickens. Instead, they found a 62-year-old man and a 72-year-old woman trying to spice up their life.

Click on the link for the full article

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Police: Man broke into firehouse, masturbated on gear

LOUISVILLE, Ky. —A man faces multiple charges after police said he broke into Metro Fire House on Jefferson Street while intoxicated and masturbated on gear.

According to the arrest report, 27-year-old Nicholas Gonzales shattered one of the bay window doors on the building, broke in, pulled gear out of lockers in a storage room and was found masturbating on the gear.

Police said he was under the influence of alcohol and when asked why he broke in, he stated, “Because I wanted to.”

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