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Scientific American: Men and Women Can't Be "Just Friends"


SkinsHokieFan

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I have been saying this for YEARS

http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=men-and-women-cant-be-just-friends

Men and Women Can't Be "Just Friends"

Can heterosexual men and women ever be “just friends”? Few other questions have provoked debates as intense, family dinners as awkward, literature as lurid, or movies as memorable. Still, the question remains unanswered. Daily experience suggests that non-romantic friendships between males and females are not only possible, but common—men and women live, work, and play side-by-side, and generally seem to be able to avoid spontaneously sleeping together. However, the possibility remains that this apparently platonic coexistence is merely a façade, an elaborate dance covering up countless sexual impulses bubbling just beneath the surface.

New research suggests that there may be some truth to this possibility—that we may think we’re capable of being “just friends” with members of the opposite sex, but the opportunity (or perceived opportunity) for “romance” is often lurking just around the corner, waiting to pounce at the most inopportune moment.

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I don't necessarily know if I agree with this. I have a lot of male friends that I would NEVER want to be romantically involved with EVER lol. I think it just depends on whether or not you're attracted to something about that person. If there's nothing that attracts you, then I think it's completely normal, and not that difficult, to remain just "friends".

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I don't necessarily know if I agree with this. I have a lot of male friends that I would NEVER want to be romantically involved with EVER lol. I think it just depends on whether or not you're attracted to something about that person. If there's nothing that attracts you, then I think it's completely normal, and not that difficult, to remain just "friends".

Go ask those male friends that if presented the opportunity if theyd get romantically involved.

:ols:

That will probably give a more accurate result. I will say if it were up to the female theyd have no problem being just friends. But us males are very quick hump something.

Sums it up well.

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Other than the fact that men are horrible " leg humpers", as has been stated in this thread, female friends and girlfriends are sometimes a dangerous combination. Often they won't even mention the problem and just dive into the mind games. Suddenly they're leaving crap in your car and at your house like they are marking territory. The drama can escalate quickly.

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Other than the fact that men are horrible " leg humpers", as has been stated in this thread, female friends and girlfriends are sometimes a dangerous combination. Often they won't even mention the problem and just dive into the mind games. Suddenly they're leaving crap in your car and at your house like they are marking territory. The drama can escalate quickly.

Are you saying the "friends" do this to make the girlfriend jealous?

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Are you saying the "friends" do this to make the girlfriend jealous?

You're asking me? F if I know. I just know that I wouldn't be aware there was a problem until one had apparently insulted the other past the point of forgiveness (which apparently can't happen between women).

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You're asking me? F if I know. I just know that I wouldn't be aware there was a problem until one had apparently insulted the other past the point of forgiveness (which apparently can't happen between women).

This would happen out of the blue? You never heard the girls say anything mean or nasty about each other? But, I could see something like this happening, and then the poor guy is left with an ultimatum which sucks if you really are "just friends" with the other girl. All I can say is women are jealous and catty creatures. If you're not sure how a gf would react to a friend who happens to be female, it may be an issue you want to consider before getting too involved with the gf, if the friend means that much to you.

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Completely agree. I know, as a man, I wouldn't be at all happy with my lady having best friends that are males.

Exactly. I don't care about my lady having male friends...but male friends that she hangs out with and talks to on the phone regularly...without me ??? That's border line storm Sandy waiting to happen.

My wife has a female friend that always has a lot of gay male friends...even then she is always seemingly single from my understanding.

Guys don't wan't to deal with chatty Cathy either.

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I don't necessarily know if I agree with this. I have a lot of male friends that I would NEVER want to be romantically involved with EVER lol. I think it just depends on whether or not you're attracted to something about that person. If there's nothing that attracts you, then I think it's completely normal, and not that difficult, to remain just "friends".

I guarantee those guys would give a different answer. Especially the "attracted to" part. Guys won't spend any significant amount of time with a chick he doesn't find attractive on some level... unless he has to.

Suddenly they're leaving crap in your car and at your house like they are marking territory. The drama can escalate quickly.

Stealing your clothes... that's another one they like to do.

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I don't necessarily know if I agree with this. I have a lot of male friends that I would NEVER want to be romantically involved with EVER lol. I think it just depends on whether or not you're attracted to something about that person. If there's nothing that attracts you, then I think it's completely normal, and not that difficult, to remain just "friends".

Classic! Exactly what the article said women think!

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I had a girl friend in college that was just a really cool girl, funny and fun to hang out with. I wasn't really attracted to her physically so that's how that worked between us. However, since undergrad she has become a bit more attractive in my eyes (we also stopped hanging out as much).

And yes, since then I have tried to make passes.

The article fails to mention though that, although both sides aren't in agreement, these groups are still "just friends" (mainly because of the girl).

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