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What is a reasonable age gap for a couple?


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Thread about the old dude marrying the teenager got me thinking, what is a reasonable difference in age for a couple?

I've always joked that I like the Elijah Muhhamed formula of half the man's age + 7. (If you are 40, you should marry a 27 year old).

The last girl I dated before my wife (who is 3.5 years younger than me) was a college student 10 years younger than I was. I actually liked her and found out that she later moved in with a dude older than I was. So, obviously, she is nuts and not me.

Anyway....what's a good difference? What is too much?

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As long as they are compatible, age doesn't matter. By compatible I mean they are aware of and agree to anything that might arise out of age difference (such as an older person not wanting kids, or realizing that the other person will be geriatric and likely die long before you do in an extreme age difference).

Personally, I'd say 3 years because that's the difference between me and my wife.

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I used to have this discussion fairly frequently with my last girlfriend.

She was (strangely enough) really attracted to older guys like Nick Saban and Tom Brokaw.

My position was that each case is probably a little unique, as certain people are mature enough to handle larger age gaps in their relationships whereas others probably aren't, but I think that in general, the older each person is, the larger the age gap could probably be (and still work as a functional, meaningful relationship).

I'm usually more skeptical of a 20 year old woman dating a 35 year old guy, than I am of a 30 year old woman dating a 55 year old guy.

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When I was 30 I dated a woman of 44. Not one of my best escapades as it was an unplanned affair that turned into something more, to the point she seriously considered leaving the marriage behind.

Not something I'm at all proud of, and not a road I'd ever go down again; but the point being to the thread at hand is I never felt I had someone significantly older on my arm when we were out together. And I definitely could of seen myself with her long term under different circumstances.

So I guess 14 years difference at least isn't a problem to me.

Hail.

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the half your age +7 rule isn't who you're SUPPOSED to date, it's who's ACCEPTABLE to date for your age.

Exactly. It accounts for people getting a bit more mature as they age and keeps creepy 30 year olds from dating high school chicks.

For instance, a 30 year old dating an 18 year old is not acceptable. (30/2 = 15 + 7 equal 22, making 22 the minimum for a 30 year old, an 8 year gap).

However, if you are 50, then you can date a 32 year old, an 18 year gap (50/2 = 25 + 7 = 32).

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It's just whatever feels right. I was 38 and was dating a 25 year old for a bit. The sex was amazing. The relationship didn't end well, but that's another story..

Thats why you shouldnt have that age difference and "be a couple." Just :hump:ing for a while does not make you a couple. :)

---------- Post added June-22nd-2011 at 03:58 PM ----------

What if they are a gay couple ?

I dunno, how old is your boyfriend?

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I'm going out on a limb and saying that the age difference was not the biggest problem that relationship faced.

*Chuckles. Trust you Lkb.

Security. When push came to shove, as much as she claimed to be unhappy in her marriage, the security of the home and family unit won out over starting over again in middle age. It was something that we never should of allowed happen, and something that developed into something else fast as feelings rolled. And certainly not something I'm proud of. At all. Not to condone me, but the guilt of being on the outside is just as great a burden as being the one cheating on his/her partner.

As much as I deeply felt for her, not an episode of my life I look back on with any great joy.

But enough of my sordid past, back to the thread at hand .....

Hail.

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Thats why you shouldnt have that age difference and "be a couple." Just :hump:ing for a while does not make you a couple. :)

We were definitely a couple otherwise it wouldn't have bothered me so bad that she cheated.

Karma is a *****. From the time I was 25 until about 30, I went out with 5 different married women. I rationalized to myself that they were the ones cheating and not me. I was way wrong and it's something I regret, but it's not something I can go back and change either. Married women were easier to date for me at the time because I could still do what I wanted without having to answer to anyone. It's not right, but it just is what it is.

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What if they are a gay couple ?

You need a top and a bottom.

---------- Post added June-22nd-2011 at 03:31 PM ----------

I'm almost 38 and have dates this week with girls who aren't in their early 20's and I'm very proud of myself. This past week, 21, 22, 30 and 43 were acceptable ages.

Who has four dates in one week? That sounds utterly exhausting.

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I'm almost 38 and have dates this week with girls who aren't in their early 20's and I'm very proud of myself. This past week, 21, 22, 30 and 43 were acceptable ages.

I would applaud, but I'm going to need to see pics first. :ols:

---------- Post added June-22nd-2011 at 04:44 PM ----------

slightly off topic. Did anyone ever pass a couple on the street that makes you go, "How the **** did that happened?" I had many of those moments when I went to OBX last week.

The answer is always the same thing.

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I would applaud, but I'm going to need to see pics first. :ols:

.

I'm not proud of the oldest one. I was out drinking until sunrise and woke up next to her at 2pm. Didn't even know who it was at first, did a "oh god damn it, again" and then did it again and then pretended to fall back asleep. :ols:

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