Tell me about your Town Nut

[Dan T.]

None in the general vicinity of where I live, but where I work is a little different. I work in the Chinatown area of D.C., and in that general area...let's say G and H streets, crossed with 9th and 10th...there is the African American guy who jogs a lot. Big headphones. The thing is, he sometimes jogs down the middle of the streets, along the double yellow lines, or if they're one way, then down the middle where the lines would be, while cars zoom around him. Other times, he's on the sidewalks, but I've never figured out why he chooses one or the other. He also randomly screams "HEY" at the top of his lungs while jogging, and I have no idea why he does this either. If he's stuck at a light, he dances in place.

I can't believe he hasn't been arrested for running in the street, or plowed into by a car, but he is wildly entertaining.

If it's the same dude I'm thinking of, you left out the best part... he almost always jogs BACKWARDS. At least he did when I was working over there 2 or 3 years ago. The guy is slightly off, but he's in amazing shape.

Another guy near my old office, homeless guy, used to ask for spare change. The weird part was that he'd always ask for 26 cents. Not a quarter. 26 cents. I figured maybe he was charging tax.

[TimmySmith]

If it's the same dude I'm thinking of, you left out the best part... he almost always jogs BACKWARDS. At least he did when I was working over there 2 or 3 years ago. The guy is slightly off, but he's in amazing shape.

Yep right in the middle of the road backwards. I remember this guy from 15 years ago and he was not young then. He could be 60 years old and in incredible shape.

[Forehead]

If it's the same dude I'm thinking of, you left out the best part... he almost always jogs BACKWARDS. At least he did when I was working over there 2 or 3 years ago. The guy is slightly off, but he's in amazing shape.

You're absolutely right, it's the same guy. I can't believe I forgot that part. Yes, he does often jog backwards down the middle of the street while yelling. You'll be glad to know he's still alive and well.

[sundown]

None in the general vicinity of where I live, but where I work is a little different. I work in the Chinatown area of D.C., and in that general area...let's say G and H streets, crossed with 9th and 10th...there is the African American guy who jogs a lot. Big headphones. The thing is, he sometimes jogs down the middle of the streets, along the double yellow lines, or if they're one way, then down the middle where the lines would be, while cars zoom around him. Other times, he's on the sidewalks, but I've never figured out why he chooses one or the other. He also randomly screams "HEY" at the top of his lungs while jogging, and I have no idea why he does this either. If he's stuck at a light, he dances in place.

I can't believe he hasn't been arrested for running in the street, or plowed into by a car, but he is wildly entertaining.

I was watching that guy a couple weeks ago from my hotel room at the Hyatt. he was on the Jersey Wall dancing for a group of the construction workers and then went to the intersection and danced while directing traffic. This went on for at least 20 minutes.......Better than tv...

[Predicto]

San Francisco has more than its share of town nuts, most of whom came from YOUR town (wherever that is ) But of all the nuts we have, one man stands above them like a veritable colossus.

Frank Chu - the 12 Galaxies man.

At any San Francisco public march, event, speech, protest, ceremony, no matter what it is about or where it is held - Frank Chu will be there. And he will think that all the protestors (or celebrators or marchers or attendees) are there for only one reason - to show support for Frank Chu and his issues.

That's right. If the thousands of people around him are all wearing Giant's gear and cheering about the World Series victory, Frank Chu thinks they are all there because of the 12 Galaxies conspiracy. If everyone is stereotypically gay, waiving rainbow flags and wearing leather chaps, Frank Chu thinks they are all there because of the 12 Galaxies conspiracy. If everyone is attending a farmers' market, Frank Chu thinks they are all there because of the 12 Galaxies conspiracy. And the 12 galaxies conspiracy is completely incomprehensible.

We love him.

Here's 4 minutes of Frank Chu. Watch it. It is 4 minutes well spent.

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=1149394286006250992#

[Forehead]

Well, I think so far I win the award for the guy most well known by others on the board, but Predicto's guy has his own Wikipedia page.

[The Brave Little Toaster Oven]

has anyone seen Bible Dude walking around route 4 in Forestville and District Heights? He just walks up and down Marlboro Pike and Pennsylvania Ave holding a Bible and giving everyone a peace sign.

[Lombardi's_kid_brother]

has anyone seen Bible Dude walking around route 4 in Forestville and District Heights? He just walks up and down Marlboro Pike and Pennsylvania Ave holding a Bible and giving everyone a peace sign.

No.

Is the "Catholic Priests Molest Boys Worldwide" guy still on Massachusetts?

DC and San Francisco are almost unfair entrants into this competition.

Zooney and Major need to step up. I'm sure their little Mayberrys have someone who fits the bill.

And for SHF... Bin Laden does not count. Good effort though.

[RVAbrendan]

If it's the same dude I'm thinking of, you left out the best part... he almost always jogs BACKWARDS. At least he did when I was working over there 2 or 3 years ago. The guy is slightly off, but he's in amazing shape.

Another guy near my old office, homeless guy, used to ask for spare change. The weird part was that he'd always ask for 26 cents. Not a quarter. 26 cents. I figured maybe he was charging tax.

A hobo asked me for $1.04 yesterday outside of a 7-11.

[Dan T.]

I've got a friend in Houston who says this nut appeared in his neighborhood a year or two ago. He yells at people walking by, proclaiming himself as some kind of super-brained oracle. Whenever a black person walks by he pulls them aside and in a conspiratorial voice tells them that white peoples' hearts are filled with racism. He is like an idiot savant with facts about organized crime figures and right wing conspiracy nuts. Maybe he's kindred spirits with them, who knows. And here's an odd tidbit - he claims he's related to Vince Lombardi. Weird.

[Lombardi's_kid_brother]

I've got a friend in Houston who says this nut appeared in his neighborhood a year or two ago. He yells at people walking by, proclaiming himself as some kind of super-brained oracle. Whenever a black person walks by he pulls them aside and in a conspiratorial voice tells them that white peoples' hearts are filled with racism. He is like an idiot savant with facts about organized crime figures and right wing conspiracy nuts. Maybe he's kindred spirits with them, who knows. And here's an odd tidbit - he claims he's related to Vince Lombardi. Weird.

That dude probably pulls in amazing trim.

[Predicto]

DC and San Francisco are almost unfair entrants into this competition.

We had the original Town Nut' date=' the celebrated and beloved Emperor Norton, Imperial Majesty of these United States and Protector of Mexico.

He lost all his money in a bad business deal, lost his mind, declared himself Emperor, and started issuing royal decrees and laws, printed his own money, and so forth. For 21 years, San Franciscans not only tolerated him, but they treated him with deference. 30,000 people attended his funeral.

Norton spent his days as inspecting San Francisco's streets in an elaborate blue uniform with gold-plated epaulets, given to him by officers of the United States Army post at the Presidio of San Francisco. He also wore a beaver hat decorated with a pea**** feather and a rosette.[25] He frequently enhanced this regal posture with a cane or an umbrella. During his inspections, Norton would examine the condition of the sidewalks and cable cars, the state of repair of public property, and the appearance of police officers.[26] Norton would also frequently give lengthy philosophical expositions on a variety of topics to anyone within earshot at the time.

During one of his inspections Norton is said to have performed one of his most famous acts of "diplomacy." During the 1860s and 1870s, there were occasional anti-Chinese demonstrations in the poorer districts of San Francisco. Ugly riots, sometimes resulting in fatalities, took place. During one incident, Norton is claimed to have positioned himself between the rioters and their Chinese targets; with a bowed head, he started reciting the Lord's Prayer repeatedly until the rioters dispersed without incident.[26]

Norton was loved and revered by the citizens of San Francisco. Although penniless, he regularly ate at the finest restaurants in San Francisco; restaurateurs took it upon themselves to add brass plaques in their entrances declaring "y Appointment to his Imperial Majesty, Emperor Norton I of the United States."[27] Such "Imperial seals of approval" were prized and a substantial boost to trade. No play or musical performance in San Francisco would dare to open without reserving balcony seats for Norton.[9]

.....

In 1867, a policeman named Armand Barbier arrested Norton to commit him to involuntary treatment for a mental disorder.[3] The Emperor's arrest outraged the citizens and sparked scathing editorials in the newspapers. Police Chief Patrick Crowley ordered Norton released and issued a formal apology on behalf of the police force.[9] Crowley wrote "that he had shed no blood; robbed no one; and despoiled no country; which is more than can be said of his fellows in that line."[11] Norton magnanimously granted an "Imperial Pardon" to the errant policeman. All police officers of San Francisco thereafter saluted Norton as he passed in the street.[26]

Norton did receive some tokens of recognition for his position. The 1870 U.S. census lists Joshua Norton as 50 years old and residing at 624 Commercial Street; his occupation was "Emporer" [sic].[4][29] Norton also issued his own money to pay for his debts, and it became an accepted local currency in San Francisco. These notes came in denominations between from fifty cents and ten dollars; the few survivng notes are collector's items. The city of San Francisco also honored Norton. When his uniform began to look shabby, the San Francisco Board of Supervisors bought him a suitably regal replacement. Norton sent a gracious thank you note and issued a "patent of nobility in perpetuity" for each supervisor.

.....

Norton's funeral on Sunday, January 10, was solemn, mournful, and large. Paying their respects were members of "...all classes from capitalists to the pauper, the clergyman to the pickpocket, well-dressed ladies and those whose garb and bearing hinted of the social outcast."[10] Some accounts say as many as 30,000 people lined the streets, and that the funeral cortege was two miles (3 km) long. San Francisco's total population was then just 230,000.[35] Norton was buried in the Masonic Cemetery, at the expense of the City of San Francisco.[9]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emperor_Norton

[Lombardi's_kid_brother]

We had the original Town Nut, the celebrated and beloved Emperor Norton, Imperial Majesty of these United States and Protector of Mexico.

He lost all his money in a bad business deal, lost his mind, declared himself Emperor, and started issuing royal decrees and laws, printed his own money, and so forth. For 21 years, San Franciscans not only tolerated him, but they treated him with deference. 30,000 people attended his funeral.

I just read about him recently. Isn't there a plaque on the Bay Bridge crediting it as his idea or something?

[MassSkinsFan]

Four classics come to mind:

1) "The Barking Man." I work in Central Square (Cambridge) which has a few very famous rock clubs and a bunch of crazy people. One of the clubs, the Middle East, seems to have an arrangement with a local crazy I call the Barking Man. He's always around Central in shorts and workboots, and rarely ever wearing a shirt despite his giant gut. In the winter, he shovels the sidewalk in front of the Middle East. With shorts and no shirt. But what makes him really fun is that he doesn't speak - he barks. And he barks at people as they walk by, sometimes chasing them and yapping.

2) The Cherry Street Religiousmobile Guy. In Somerville where I live, there was a guy who had a station wagon and a house covered in religious signs similar to the signs in Comrade's Post 12. They were Biblical quotes that reflected his opinions. One day I was off work early drinking beer in my front yard (paved and surrounded by a chain link fence) with a friend who is bisexual. The Cherry Street guy pulled up to the stoplight in front of the house, and we saw a sign on the side that said "Homosexuals are an abomination in the eyes of the Lord." My friend jumped over the fence and ran up to him, asking him out on a "date" in a very graphic way. The guy freaked. Priceless.

3) Mass Ave skater. Again in Central there was a guy like the jogger Forehead described, only he was really really tall and skinny, had a giant Afro, carried a boombox and got around on roller skates (old school not in-line). He tended to wear short shorts and tank tops, usually in bright color combos like pink and neon yellow. He also liked to hold onto those ribbons from the pseudo-gymnastic thing (rhythmic maybe?) and trail them behind him as he cruised down Mass Ave. The guy was amazing, one of the best skaters I've ever seen. Sadly he's not around anymore and no one knows where he went.

4) Mr. Butch.

Butch was everywhere back in the 80s and 90s. Out front of lots of clubs, in them sometimes, weaving down the street, stopping/directing traffic. For some reason he liked a band I was in, and whenever he'd run into one of us on the street he'd call us by the name of the band. He was a legend in Boston during his reign as "King of Kenmore" and "King of Allston." My favorite memory of him was seeing him and 2 other guys busking, playing air guitar (one of them was air drumming) outside the Rathskeller (aka The Rat) one night, with a sign that said "Mixed Nuts. Need Help" and a hat for contributions.

[Dan T.]

Very cool story about Emperor Norton, and what a beautiful reflection on the people of San Francisco in the late 1800s.

And that's an interesting trio of Boston eccentrics MSF...

[Predicto]

I just read about him recently. Isn't there a plaque on the Bay Bridge crediting it as his idea or something?

Yes' date=' because it was his idea (and he often rebuked his subjects for failing to implement his plan quickly enough )

[greenspandan]

well, whatever happened to Levi Levy i wonder? he was a guy who used to hang out in old town alexandria and hand out flyers supporting or condeming marginally comprehensible political causes. he would also run for public office every election cycle. oh hey ... just googled him and found a profile on washingtonpost.com from 2003! http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/elections/2003/candidates/697/

there was also a guy known as Larry who had a mustache and a cape and he'd go to lots of local punk rock shows and take pictures. he liked pop-punk, and especially bands with female members. when he got really excited, he would dance. i remember Pete Shelley stopping a Buzz****s show to compliment him once.

[Conn]

There's a middle-aged crazy guy who spends literally all day, every day sweeping the sidewalks and picking up garbage along the streets in my small town. Griswold, CT. Good luck finding it on a map. No idea what the population is, but its small.

Anyways, apparently he's been doing this for 20+ years. Lives with his parents, I guess. I'm assuming he's got some mental issues, but he's not much of a talker. I do know he can speak just fine and string together thoughts, though, because he spoke at the event I'm about to talk about.

About three years ago, there was a small event held at the town hall in honor of this crazy guy. He was given a brand new broom (small kitchen broom type), a big broom (2+ feet wide), a garbage can on wheels, etc. Oh, and a nice certificate/award kind of thing. I'm not sure who decided to recognize the constant clean-up work this guy had done for 2+ decades, but I thought it was pretty cool that they did.

He's still doing it as far as I know, but I don't go home from school very often. Honestly? The guy was never creepy, which is surprising. Just weird, and quiet. Quite a work ethic though.

[Lombardi's_kid_brother]

well, whatever happened to Levi Levy i wonder? he was a guy who used to hang out in old town alexandria and hand out flyers supporting or condeming marginally comprehensible political causes. he would also run for public office every election cycle. oh hey ... just googled him and found a profile on washingtonpost.com from 2003! http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/elections/2003/candidates/697/

there was also a guy known as Larry who had a mustache and a cape and he'd go to lots of local punk rock shows and take pictures. he liked pop-punk, and especially bands with female members. when he got really excited, he would dance. i remember Pete Shelley stopping a Buzz****s show to compliment him once.

Levi Levy is exactly what I'm looking for.

I had no idea that Alexandria was a typhus epidemic waiting to happen.

---------- Post added May-5th-2011 at 01:39 PM ----------

There's a middle-aged crazy guy who spends literally all day, every day sweeping the sidewalks and picking up garbage along the streets in my small town. Griswold, CT. Good luck finding it on a map. No idea what the population is, but its small.

Anyways, apparently he's been doing this for 20+ years. Lives with his parents, I guess. I'm assuming he's got some mental issues, but he's not much of a talker. I do know he can speak just fine and string together thoughts, though, because he spoke at the event I'm about to talk about.

About three years ago, there was a small event held at the town hall in honor of this crazy guy. He was given a brand new broom (small kitchen broom type), a big broom (2+ feet wide), a garbage can on wheels, etc. Oh, and a nice certificate/award kind of thing. I'm not sure who decided to recognize the constant clean-up work this guy had done for 2+ decades, but I thought it was pretty cool that they did.

He's still doing it as far as I know, but I don't go home from school very often. Weirdly? The guy was never creepy. Just weird, and quiet. Quite a work ethic though.

You know, there is a weird value in having people like that.

There are three sisters in my town who live together and all have some kind of mental disability. But they are functional and perfectly safe. They seem to survive by having a daily paper route on which they collect bottles and other recycables. A city council member once told me that he wanted to give a plaque to them for keeping the town so clean. And it's true. You will never see a Coke bottle or beer can lying in a vacant lot or in the street, because it will be in their collection within 24 hours.

[polywog999]

True story....

I was once fired from a job for showing up to work in a gorilla mask, my girlfriends bikini, and a strap-on....hey, it was casual Friday.

Not all pranks are "funny."

[thebluefood]

The Emperor Norton story was awesome. Only in America, man.

Here at ECU, we sometimes get a visit from a minister who stands on the mall, waving a small Bible, telling everyone they're going to hell. He's attracted crowds in the 100s on good days. Some come to debate, others just to watch in disbelief.

---------- Post added May-5th-2011 at 02:56 PM ----------

True story....

I was once fired from a job for showing up to work in a gorilla mask, my girlfriends bikini, and a strap-on....hey, it was casual Friday.

Not all pranks are "funny."

You are a marvelous person, polywog. Never change.

[Conn]

You know' date=' there is a weird value in having people like that.

There are three sisters in my town who live together and all have some kind of mental disability. But they are functional and perfectly safe. They seem to survive by having a daily paper route on which they collect bottles and other recycables. A city council member once told me that he wanted to give a plaque to them for keeping the town so clean. And it's true. You will never see a Coke bottle or beer can lying in a vacant lot or in the street, because it will be in their collection within 24 hours.[/quote']

So true. Our town is spotless, where he goes. He's tireless, too.

[polywog999]

The Emperor Norton story was awesome. Only in America, man.

Here at ECU, we sometimes get a visit from a minister who stands on the mall, waving a small Bible, telling everyone they're going to hell. He's attracted crowds in the 100s on good days. Some come to debate, others just to watch in disbelief.

---------- Post added May-5th-2011 at 02:56 PM ----------

You are a marvelous person, polywog. Never change.

When I was a kid I used to draw maps on how to get to the hospital for other people in case I freaked out. Also, I used to make my mom get her hair cut only a half inch at a time so that I would not kirk.

[d0ublestr0ker0ll]

Rockville, MD

- Guy at the Baltimore Rd 7-11 who digs through the trash cans while cursing very loudly. It always sounds like he wants to get in a fight, but he's focused on the trash. He doesn't stop cursing and yelling, but he never runs in to any trouble because he's ignorant to the world around him. He's a white guy with dirty clothes, his jeans hang below his ass, he never has any underwear on, full moon.

- Two guys at Twinbrook Shopping Center. The Mexican paces up and down the shopping center yelling in Spanish, very loudly. He doesn't stop, he's yelling to himself. Again, he's a guy that seems numb to the world around him. He just blabbers up a storm and never talks to anybody. The other guy shows up every so often, but he sits next to the TV store and smokes a pack of cigarettes without a break. Completely strung out, probably heroine, but dude is out of his mind. Just sits there in dreamland and smokes, smile on his face the whole time.

- Guy at Twinbrook and Rockville Metro Stations...Old Japanese man with Kung Fu Master hairstyle. Very long hair, Totally looks like the martial arts master in Kill Bill 2. But this guy digs through trash cans like they're full of money. No shame, no hesitation, he has beautiful swan diving technique. Goes right in there and will bag things like empty cups and napkins, which if you put it all together screams: Living in the woods or in an alley. He's been around since I can remember, always wondered if he hit up any stations in DC or elsewhere...

[Lombardi's_kid_brother]

Rockville, MD

- Guy at the Baltimore Rd 7-11 who digs through the trash cans while cursing very loudly. It always sounds like he wants to get in a fight, but he's focused on the trash. He doesn't stop cursing and yelling, but he never runs in to any trouble because he's ignorant to the world around him. He's a white guy with dirty clothes, his jeans hang below his ass, he never has any underwear on, full moon.

- Two guys at Twinbrook Shopping Center. The Mexican paces up and down the shopping center yelling in Spanish, very loudly. He doesn't stop, he's yelling to himself. Again, he's a guy that seems numb to the world around him. He just blabbers up a storm and never talks to anybody. The other guy shows up every so often, but he sits next to the TV store and smokes a pack of cigarettes without a break. Completely strung out, probably heroine, but dude is out of his mind. Just sits there in dreamland and smokes, smile on his face the whole time.

- Guy at Twinbrook and Rockville Metro Stations...Old Japanese man with Kung Fu Master hairstyle. Very long hair, Totally looks like the martial arts master in Kill Bill 2. But this guy digs through trash cans like they're full of money. No shame, no hesitation, he has beautiful swan diving technique. Goes right in there and will bag things like empty cups and napkins, which if you put it all together screams: Living in the woods or in an alley. He's been around since I can remember, always wondered if he hit up any stations in DC or elsewhere...

Eh...I don't really want to hear a ton of stories about schizophrenic homeless people. That's just kinda sad.

Granted, my town nut was probably schizophrenic, but he had a home and a mom and a dog and a library card...and apparently a deep-seated belief in rule by plebescite.

---------- Post added May-5th-2011 at 02:19 PM ----------

Here at ECU, we sometimes get a visit from a minister who stands on the mall, waving a small Bible, telling everyone they're going to hell. He's attracted crowds in the 100s on good days. Some come to debate, others just to watch in disbelief.

I'm of the opinion that every downtown needs a street preacher.