Do you and your significant other go to bed at the same time?

[Ax]

i wanna know how many of the self proclaimed "night owls" in here have young children. Deal with a 2 year old for a few hours in the evening....that'll get ya nodding by 9 or 10 pm.

No ****.

Terrible two's will turn a night owl into an old bird, quick!

[gbear]

Drop,

I have a 3 year old and a 4 year old. I know about the needing more down time when you have little ones.

My 3 year old doesn't sleep a lot. He is a wound up motor all the time. Dealing with him is tiring as all get out. My 4 year old is a chronically tired 4 year old (heart condition). Both kids have medical issues. They are tiring.

By the time my son goes to sleep around 9, my wife is either in bed already or on her way. There's still a kitchen to clean, dogs to walk, shower to take, etc. So sometime around 9:30 to 9:45 if I've been able to do things along the way, my chores are done. If I go to bed then, I am still too wound up. The extra hour for me to just chill pays off far more the next day than an extra hour of sleep.

I keep trying to tell my wife, it's abut down time every bit as much as it is about sleep. I think the focus of sleep being the only downtime is over played. Read a trashy book, watch tv, play the computer. All of those have the same impact as sleep on my ability to function the next day. The only difference is my happyness.

[Drop]

Drop,

I have a 3 year old and a 4 year old. I know about the needing more down time when you have little ones.

My 3 year old doesn't sleep a lot. He is a wound up motor all the time. Dealing with him is tiring as all get out. My 4 year old is a chronically tired 4 year old (heart condition). Both kids have medical issues. They are tiring.

By the time my son goes to sleep around 9, my wife is either in bed already or on her way. There's still a kitchen to clean, dogs to walk, shower to take, etc. So sometime around 9:30 to 9:45 if I've been able to do things along the way, my chores are done. If I go to bed then, I am still too wound up. The extra hour for me to just chill pays off far more the next day than an extra hour of sleep.

I keep trying to tell my wife, it's abut down time every bit as much as it is about sleep. I think the focus of sleep being the only downtime is over played. Read a trashy book, watch tv, play the computer. All of those have the same impact as sleep on my ability to function the next day. The only difference is my happyness.

word i hear ya on that. Rest and relaxation can be just as beneficial as sleep to me as well sometimes. But i'm not gonna lie, even if i'm simply resting and relaxing...odds are i'm probably still tired.

a night owl I am not anymore. on the weekends i can stay up a while, but i get up far too early throughout the week and have a wirey 2 1/2 year old on my hands so i'm not even gonna front.....this homeboy needs his sleep. lol

[HighOnHendrix]

That sucks, I hate apartments. Luckily my husband is dead to the world when he sleeps and never hears me (I always ask b/c of course I wouldn't do it if it bothered or woke him).

We live in a townhouse, and our neighbors, well, let's just say I don't give a crap if it disturbs them or not. Even before we moved in, OUR yard was their little personal doggie park (even though there's an empty field like, 100 yards away) and there's crap all over the place. We put up signs and everything letting them know people LIVE in the house now and please don't allow you dogs to run over and take a dookie on our lawn...yet the people STILL bring their damn dogs over to poop and pee all over the place. AND they throw their cigarettes in our driveway while they're waiting for their dog to do its business. AND they have parked in our spot on multiple occasions. So really, I couldn't care less if my vacuuming at 2am bothers them.

It's really too bad that all our other neighbors are great and we live in a good neighborhood...it just so happens we have a family of jackasses who live right next to us.

I was in a townhouse for five years before I moved down here to VA. I never disturbed my neighbors nor them me with vacuuming or music or anything. Maybe it was the diff between being side by side vs. upstairs/downstairs. Or maybe I just had thick walls at that place. I hear them walking around and flushing the toilet and everything. They cry about me playing my bass. Oh, and dogs crap in my yard, too. Sounds like yours is heavy-duty, though.

[Peeping Wizard]

Working full time and going to law school at night cured me of any sleep problems I used to have. It also made me much more of a morning person than I was in my early 20s when I used to stay up late and play Xbox until 2-3 am.

[greenspandan]

i wanna know how many of the self proclaimed "night owls" in here have young children. Deal with a 2 year old for a few hours in the evening....that'll get ya nodding by 9 or 10 pm.

haha i DO have a two year old at home!

[Peeping Wizard]

i wanna know how many of the self proclaimed "night owls" in here have young children. Deal with a 2 year old for a few hours in the evening....that'll get ya nodding by 9 or 10 pm.

Yea, that makes a big difference as well. We have a 6 year old and a 9 month old and they can be really taxing.

I hear you guys about "down time." I would get home at 10:30 after getting to work before 7 that morning and still need to read, watch tv or play a video game for an hour before hitting the hay. Having a little "me time" every day is very important and helps me stay focused.

[MissU28]

During the week, my boyfriend likes to go to sleep earlier than I do. He's pretty much ready to be asleep by 930-10pm. I try and go to bed around 10:30. He gets mad at me if I'm sitting there in bed with the laptop on while he's trying to sleep. I'm just not ready that early.

HOWEVER, on the weekend it's the total opposite. I get tired so early on the weekends. I'll go to bed hours before him on the weekends, sometimes even earlier than weekdays! I'm a weirdo.

[sacase]

I have to get up for work at 5 am. My wife gets up a little before me. I still don't go to sleep until around 11 pm but she is usually out around 9 pm. She will fall asleep on the couch and when I am ready to go to bed I wake her up and we go to bed.

honestly, it drives me nuts because once she falls asleep on the couch I have to stay somewhat quiet or she complains. I've told her once she gets sleepy, go to bed and I'll come in when I'm ready but she refuses. Some nights when I feel like making a point, I'll leave her on the couch and go get the bed to myself.

This is my exact situation as well. I usually don't get to bed before midnight (with Ambien), my GF sleeps constantly. I will be up watching a movie, working on homework or playing a game and she will be knocked out on the couch and refuses to get in the bed until I got. I get annoyed because she just sleeps on the couch and I feel like she is crowding me. She can literally get home from work at 5, lay on the couch and sleep till 7, get up and cook something to eat, eat half of it, go back on the couch and sleep till I get tired taking bathroom breaks and sleep eating (yes she eats while she is sleeping). During the Blizzard, she would litterally sleep 18+ hours a day. I don't know how she does it, I have never seen anyone sleep so much in my life. Then on the flip side you have me with my sleep problems.

[Spanky22]

Not needing as much sleep as others, knowing that, and coordinating your routine to work for you IS discipline.

From early teens until mid 40's, you could almost set your watch by how long I'd sleep before waking up.

4 hours. No matter how tired, drunk, stoned, or any combination of the three, and more, it's all I could sleep, and it's all I needed. Every other month, there'd be a day I'd sleep 8hrs, and feel like ****.

Now days, the average is closer to 5hrs. I get to bed between 11-12, and I usually wake up before the alarm goes off at 4am. If I fall asleep at 9, I'm up at 2am. I don't even try to go back to sleep.

Discipline, is knowing what you need to do, in order to get enough rest for work/school, and then doing it. Sounds like that's exactly what you're doing.

Ah ok, now I see what you are saying. Fair enough. I misunderstood your other post.

Cheers! :2drunks:

[MissU28]

and sleep eating (yes she eats while she is sleeping).

Wait what????? I don't get it. How do you eat while you are sleeping????

I am so confused.

Sounds like your gf needs to go to the doctor.

[sacase]

Wait what????? I don't get it. How do you eat while you are sleeping????

I am so confused.

Sounds like your gf needs to go to the doctor.

Its actually kind of funny. She will have crackers or a bag of chips on the table next to the couch. She will reach over and eat a few and has no memory of doing so. I thought she just woke up ate them and went back to sleep right away, but she truly has no memory of eating.

[Special K]

Ax, maybe things will change once I have my own children, but when I took care of my nieces and nephew (2, 8, 12) for 2 weeks while my brother and wife were gone on vacation, not much changed. Went to bed a little earlier, around 1, but woke up early to get them up, ready, lunches packed and off to school and went about my day.

The schedule is survivable, I am able to function during the day and everything. It's just annoying as I'd like to go to bed earlier and I know it's better for me to get more sleep, I just can't until everything's perfect in the house and all my school tasks or work tasks are finished. Maybe that's what I need to work on, letting stuff go and not worrying about every tiny detail, but I've been OCD since I was a little kid and I really don't see that ever changing. Maybe if it starts interferring with my productivity I'll see someone about it, but right now it works for me and my husband is fine with our different bedtime hours.

I'd buy a pooper scooper (or get a shovel) and fling all the poo back in their yard and I'd get a leaf blower and blow all the cigarette butts back in their driveway....and I'd do it at 2 AM!!! :evilg:

Wow. No way I could put up with that. Have you talked to them, personally? Or to the HOA? (if there is one). Wait, isn't your husband a trained fighter?:evilg:

Lol, well, we put up signs along the perimeter of the yard that say "Curb your dog." Obviously that's not working as the dogs are still allowed to come over. One dog also tried to attack the puppy I was babysitting for a friend. We've talked to them, but they are stupid...as in very dumb and it's clear they don't understand our concerns. Whatever, when the weather warms up, we will be building a fence to put an end to it. Until the weather warms up, I'm content vacuuming at 2am and my husband has no qualms about playing his electric guitar or using his sander, buffer, or saw machines in the garage at 11pm or later.

[Teller]

I'm a night owl and rarely get tired before midnight. My wife on the other hand has transformed into a person that is out cold by 11 at the latest. It doesn't bother me at all but it seems to bother her and I'm receptive to that. I try to go to bed early but I end up staring at the ceiling for literally 2 hours. The worst part is that I have an over active mind and I tend to work whenever the thought enters my head. In my world it would be perfectly normal to get up at 1am and put together a plan for next tuesday.

I'm not the type to take sleeping pills (or any pills) unless I need them badly. Is this normal? Do you people in redskin land all go to bed at the same time as your spouses/gf?

... and people we are talking about sleeping here.

I never did when I was married, Des. And I would respectfully suggest not making the same mistake I did. While I would ALWAYS go in and kiss my ex good night, it's not the same. If you can, find a way to relax your mind, and go to bed when she does.

This is something that seems to be far more important to women than to us, but spending that time in the sack when she does (even to sleep) will only comfort her, and make her realize how important to you she is. Who cares if you're just a teddy bear (an inanimate object there to make her feel safe.) I promise you, she'll feel better. And when she feels better......well, y'know.

It's not about sex, but security. And when she feels secure, things get better for you too.

I miss my marriage, the good times, so much. I can't help but hope my friends out there avoid ALL of the mistakes I made. Remember, buddy, nothing is more important than the woman you pledged your life too (and of course your kids if you have any.) Not even next Tuesday. My best to your family.

[Blackest Eyes]

It is difficult to go to bed at the same time as my girlfriend. She just went to bed now...I will easily be up until 1 AM. It doesn't really bother either of us, it is just difficult since I don't work a 9-5 job like her and my schedule changes week to week.

[BayouBrave86]

How do you guys manage to stay awake the next day? I, too can't get to sleep until around 1am. And I usually have to be up by 7-7:30 the next morning. I've been trying to figure out a way to stay focused and alert in the morning haha. Oh and yeah the more hours I sleep the drowsier I am the next day as well. I can get by with 6 hours or 7 hours of sleep, but I will still like to be more alert. My lady goes to bed pretty early though, but we aren't living together yet.

[pjfootballer]

My wife just went bed an hour ago. 10:30 is late for her. She wanted me to go to bed, but it's Friday and I don't have to get up. She has a class at 10. I just checked on her and she's asleep already. I'll be up for another hour or so.

[twa]

How do you guys manage to stay awake the next day?.

16 cups of coffee,vitamins and of course sodas.

I have been known to take naps at long redlights though:silly:

[dchogs]

nice to see so many people in the same boat. i'll have to show my wife this thread so she gets off my back. lol

[EBoz]

My wife and I NEVER go to bed at the same time. I work the second shift and I don't get in until 12:30 or so by the time I drive home. She is asleep when I get here but I go back and tell her goodnight, then come out and watch tv or mess around on the computer for a bit. I'm usually up until 3 or 4 a.m. Even on the occasional day that I'm off we still follow the same routine.

[twa]

nice to see so many people in the same boat. i'll have to show my wife this thread so she gets off my back. lol

You really think that will help?

She likely doesn't care how common it is,just wants you by her.

There are worse problems to have;)

[Ax]

Ax, maybe things will change once I have my own children, but when I took care of my nieces and nephew (2, 8, 12) for 2 weeks while my brother and wife were gone on vacation, not much changed. Went to bed a little earlier, around 1, but woke up early to get them up, ready, lunches packed and off to school and went about my day.

Well darlin', excuse my bluntness, but two months ain't ****, much less two weeks. From what I think I remember, from reading your posts, you've done a a lot of traveling, and schooling recently. You haven't really had a sleep pattern to follow for any more than a few months at a time. It would seem damn near impossible to get your body on any kind of schedule with that kind of constant change. It can take anything up to a year, or more, to accomplish such a thing.

But, that's the secret to life, isn't it? Getting to a comfortable, profitable (not just $$$) routine, and then keeping it from always feeling, routine.

The schedule is survivable, I am able to function during the day and everything. It's just annoying as I'd like to go to bed earlier and I know it's better for me to get more sleep, I just can't until everything's perfect in the house and all my school tasks or work tasks are finished.

I think, sometimes, it is most definitely related to control. While we're awake, we can feel the sensation of "control" in doing the things we think we "have" to do. And accomplishing these little things are ways we get to pat ourselves on the back and say, "Good job!" And, there's nothing wrong with that. As long as young understand what is happening.

But subconsciously, we may fear giving up control, to sleeping. And the mind doesn't want to let go. Honest, self evaluation is the most valuable thing you can ever do for yourself. While we may never be able to fully change our quirks, knowing, and accepting them, can allow us to use them to our own benefit.

Maybe that's what I need to work on, letting stuff go and not worrying about every tiny detail, but I've been OCD since I was a little kid and I really don't see that ever changing.

I don't see what being an Overly Cranky Diva has to do with anything.

Maybe if it starts interferring with my productivity I'll see someone about it, but right now it works for me and my husband is fine with our different bedtime hours.

Well, after an honest self evaluation, maybe, the only person you'll need to see, is yourself. You're a smart girl.

And as for you and your husband's different bedtime hours, don't sweat it. Hopefully one day 29 years from now, you'll be like us.

Mrs. Ax, still asleep this morning, after going to bed first last night. Me, got my 5 and ready to go.

Both of us, loving every minute.

[Special K]

Well darlin', excuse my bluntness, but two months ain't ****, much less two weeks.

Fair enough.

From what I think I remember, from reading your posts, you've done a a lot of traveling, and schooling recently. You haven't really had a sleep pattern to follow for any more than a few months at a time. It would seem damn near impossible to get your body on any kind of schedule with that kind of constant change.

True, but I've had these sleep patterns prior to extensive school, work, and travel schedules. They don't help the situation, but this isn't something that just manifested once I started having a busy, varied schedule. Like I said, I've been this way since adolescence. This is why I firmly believe that there are some people who are simply wired a bit differently.

As for the different bedtimes, I'm not sweating it. I never understood what the big deal is with going to bed at the same time or why so many people (particuarly women) think that's so important. Whatever, to each his own. If your partner's happy with your arrangement, whatever that may be, then that's the most important thing.

[stevenaa]

During the school year we hit the sheets at the same time. She is a stay at home mom, so she has to get up early to get the kids off to school. My alarm goes of at 4:20am, so I like to be in bed by 10ish. She gets more aggravated when I get up early and leave the house for whatever I'm up to. She's not a morning person and would sleep to 11 every day if she could. When I leave early to run errands or work on my boat or whatever, she feels abandoned. But she doesn't want to get up early to go along. Go figure. In the summer, she's a total night owl and I go to bed alone most nights. Doesn't bother me a bit.