Hypothetical situation involving a female (well, not really hypothetical), input plz

[SMOSS89]

Guy A and guy B are best friends. They have known each other for all of h.s and college. In college, they both have a mutual friend, who is a female (and we all know what happens when we have plutonic female friends...).

Guy A befriends said female early on, becoming very close. It is not until later that he realizes he has a crush on her, but is torn because he does not want to ruin the 'friendship'. He has since always had a soft spot for said female and waits till it feels like its the right time to want to do something. However, for whatever reason, Guy A becomes not as close as he once was to said female, leading the way to Guy B.

Guy B and said female then become best friends, and in all likelyhood, closer than Guy A ever was to her. Guy A is aware of this, and is torn again, because he realizes he should not be jealous because that's his best friend (Guy and should allow him to proceed if he wishes to make a move. However, Guy A is a human being and has feelings also, and is at times, very jealous. With signs pointing to Guy B and said female secretly hooking up, Guy A becomes increasingly upset because he knows he is in a bit of a gut wrenching situation.

Guess which one I am .

[twa]

Guy A...you snooze, ya lose

[Forehead]

The one that should have made a move earlier? You've got to make your decisions earlier, do you want a friend or something else. Indecisiveness leads to two outcomes...no friendship (because you made a move that was rejected) or the one you're experiencing right now. I suppose the 3rd outcome, actually being friends with no hidden feelings, can also exist, but how often does that really happen?

Next time be more decisive if you're interested. What's the worst that can happen, you lose a potential friend? You barely knew the girl, so you won't know what you missed out on.

[Mickalino]

just ask sjunkies - he should be an expert on women, by now

[Thiebear]

Let it go, life is too short to:

A: lose 2 friends over missed opportunities.

B: Potentially screw up their happiness.

[Burgold]

Useless without pics and a pschiatric consultation fee

[twa]

That would depend on if ya love her,I stole my wife from a friend(while she was considering his proposal),if she loved him she wouldn't had to consider it.:evilg:

[SMOSS89]

I think the tough part is feeling powerless to stop it at this point (if indeed they are doing that).

We were certainly very close, really close, in fact. And the jealousy started when I realized the thing I used to have with her she now has with him, and then some. So like an earlier poster stated, which do I value more, me getting what I want, or just letting it be and making peace with it (knowing I possibly blew a good thing)?

Any girls on here w/ any input?

[hockeysc23]

and that's why you cannot have female "best-friends" unless you marry her or date her. It's been brought up several times before. If your friends to get to a relationship it won't work.

Either date her or move on. Female best-friends are a waste of time for males trying to date.

[Burgold]

If you really feel strongly about it you should let the person know. This may easily poison the friendship either way either via regret and jealousy or through rejection (if you admit to your feelings). At least when you are honest with yourself and others you stand a chance. Pretending wears you down.

[SkinsBry]

Did Guy B know that Guy A had feelings for girl? Does Girl and Guy B have strong feelings or just hooking up? If they are secretly hooking up, does that mean that maybe both of them know that Guy A has feelings for Girl?

Basically, you have to let their "thing" run its course, whether there are deep feelings between the two or they're just friends with benefits.

[Mickalino]

I think Guy W should tell Guy O, to go **** himself, and everything will take care of itself

[SMOSS89]

If you really feel strongly about it you should let the person know. This may easily poison the friendship either way either via regret and jealousy or through rejection (if you admit to your feelings). At least when you are honest with yourself and others you stand a chance. Pretending wears you down.

Very true. Doing nothing helps only because it doesn't immediately sting. But doing nothing sucks because I won't find out the truth. So in this case, the truth can set me free.

[Thiebear]

Honesty NEVER works..

NEVER

i repeat

It will not work.

Go on a Lifetime movie network binge.. watch redeye at 3am, watch nothing but news for at least a week.

and then point out where Honesty is the best policy worked outside a greeting card?

[SMOSS89]

Honesty NEVER works..

NEVER

i repeat

It will not work.

Go on a Lifetime movie network binge.. watch redeye at 3am, watch nothing but news for at least a week.

and then point out where Honesty is the best policy worked outside a greeting card?

So you suggest sulking?

[Mickalino]

Honesty NEVER works..

NEVER

i repeat

NEVER

But are you lying when you said THAT ?

[Burgold]

Honesty NEVER works..

NEVER

i repeat

It will not work.

Go on a Lifetime movie network binge.. watch redeye at 3am, watch nothing but news for at least a week.

and then point out where Honesty is the best policy worked outside a greeting card?

Short term versus long term. Long term, honesty works best almost always. Working out best may be dissolving the friendship. It may mean causing yourself pain. It certainly brings things to the fore.

Repression is a corrosive. A little of it is good and healthy. A lot of it will make you a sick man.

[tone_dubbz]

Guy A...you snooze, ya lose

Closed mouths don't get fed.

[deejaydana]

Guy A needs to move faster next time.

I can't ever remember saying to myself in the 20's "I don't want to ruin the friendship with this girl" Yeah, never.

[Thiebear]

So you suggest sulking?

Get over it. Sulking over a woman you've never been with and claim is a friend. A real friend you hope is happy and continue on.

A piece of meat you just want to tenderize and no thought to long term.

[SMOSS89]

Short term versus long term. Long term, honesty works best almost always. Working out best may be dissolving the friendship. It may mean causing yourself pain. It certainly brings things to the fore.

Repression is a corrosive. A little of it is good and healthy. A lot of it will make you a sick man.

Yep. I'm learning the hard way.

[SMOSS89]

Get over it. Sulking over a woman you've never been with and claim is a friend. A real friend you hope is happy and continue on.

A piece of meat you just want to tenderize and no thought to long term.

I will NOT sulk, I was just responding to someone saying NOT to speak up and just feel sorry for myself, which I won't do.

[dockeryfan]

Move on, you screwed up the timing.

Find another awesome chick. Believe me, most people have one of those "what if" people in their lives. Fact? The "what if" gets you nothing. Focus on the "what now", because she will make you happy. If you sit around wondering, you

will never find the "what now"

[SMOSS89]

Move on, you screwed up the timing.

Find another awesome chick. Believe me, most people have one of those "what if" people in their lives. Fact? The "what if" gets you nothing. Focus on the "what now", because she will make you happy. If you sit around wondering, you

will never find the "what now"

Good one. I'm younger so I have yet to have that "what if". Usually it was yay or nay. So to have this sorta in between thing is tougher cause as a normal human being, your mind can easily dwell.

[kramdizzle]

That would depend on if ya love her,I stole my wife from a friend(while she was considering his proposal),if she loved him she wouldn't had to consider it.:evilg:

are you still friends with him?