China Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 Hair Stylist Keeps Armed Robber as Sex Slave In what is either the weirdest Russian crime story of the year so far or a new low in yellow crime journalism, a female hair stylist in the Kaluga region is suspected of holding an armed robber in captivity as a sex slave for two days after he unsuccessfully tried to knock over her beauty salon. Attentive Crime Watch readers will need little more than the first paragraph of this post to understand that this bizarre saga was relayed by the intrepid crime hacks over at the web site Life.ru, which, together with newspaper Tvoi Den, is setting the bar extremely high for sensationalist scoops. According to Life.ru, the events unfolded on the evening of March 14 as the stylist was wrapping up her shift at the salon in the Kaluga region town of Meshchovsk. The robber, a 32-year-old man identified by Life.ru as "Viktor," burst into the salon at around 5 p.m. waving a pistol and ordered all of the stylists and clients to hit the floor and toss him their money. At this point, 28-year-old Olga, whom Life.ru describes as a "delicate" girl trained in martial arts, was apparently still standing when she offered to hand over her cash. But when Viktor tried to accept her contribution, Olga surprised him with a quick punch to the chest, knocking the wind out of him before she flipped him to the ground. Olga proceeded to tie Viktor up with a hair-dryer cord, gagged him and dragged him into a storage room. Curiously, Life.ru reports, Olga instructed the others to keep working, telling them that the police would soon arrive. But this feel-good moment for the good guy proved ephemeral. Things soon turned ugly, according to Life.ru. The police did not come. And after the other stylists and clients went home for the evening, Olga told Viktor to "take off his underwear" and, with apologies to John Cougar Mellencamp, let her do as she pleases, lest she call the cops, Life.ru said. She tied him to the radiator with handcuffs covered in frilly pink fabric, gave him some Viagra and had her way with him several times over the next 48 hours. When she finally let him go on the evening of March 16, Viktor had been "squeezed like a lemon," Life.ru reported. First, he went to the hospital to have his injured genitals treated; then he went to police and filed a complaint asking that Olga be brought up on criminal charges for committing "actions of a sexual nature" that left him with injured sexual organs, according to a copy of the complaint posted on Life.ru. Olga was apparently incensed when she learned of the complaint. She had, after all, even tried to be nice to her purported captive. "What a jerk," Life.ru quoted her as saying. "Yeah, there were a few times. But I bought him new jeans, gave him food and drink, and gave him 1,000 rubles when he left." Click on the link for the full article Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kosher Ham Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 You sure it wasnt Mick ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Predicto Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 Viktor had been "squeezed like a lemon," Now THAT is journalism! :woot: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PiLfan Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 where's Quentin Tarantino to film this sort of thing when you need him? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stophovr6 Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 Shenanigans. Porn plots don't happen in real life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Califan007 The Constipated Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 Viktor had been "squeezed like a lemon," Now THAT is journalism! :woot: No, that's yellow journalism... Get it? "Squeezed like a lemon"..."Yellow" journalism?...Lemon? Yellow? I don't know how I come up with these gems. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Burgundy Burner Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 Useless without pics? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Predicto Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 Ueless without pics? This is Olga. and this is Viktor Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChocolateCitySkin Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 wtf?!?!?!?!? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Burgundy Burner Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 This is Olga[/url] and this is Viktor Looks more like Keeastman and Slacky. Hmmmmmm. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted April 16, 2009 Author Share Posted April 16, 2009 Viktor had been "squeezed like a lemon," Now THAT is journalism! :woot: Obviously written by a Led Zeppelin fan. "Squeeze my lemon, 'til the juice runs down my leg..." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SkinInsite Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 Bring out the gimp. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rdskn4Lyf21 Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 Is this being reported to promote robberies in hopes that this happens? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Brave Little Toaster Oven Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 isnt that every guy's fantasy? :paranoid: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slacky McSlackAss Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 Looks more like Keeastman and Slacky. Hmmmmmm. No comment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PokerPacker Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 isnt that every guy's fantasy? :paranoid: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Johnny Punani Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 Obviously written by a Led Zeppelin fan. "Squeeze my lemon, 'til the juice runs down my leg..." I was thinking the same thing...:hysterical: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slacky McSlackAss Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 I watched that episode just the other day. :rotflmao: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thedoc4454 Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 Ten to one they're happily married within 6 months. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Califan007 The Constipated Posted April 17, 2009 Share Posted April 17, 2009 Ten to one they're happily married within 6 months. Ten to one they were already dating and this was some weird form of role playing, but they were too embarrassed to admit it lol... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark The Homer Posted April 17, 2009 Share Posted April 17, 2009 Viktor had been "squeezed like a lemon," Now after forty years I finally know what Zep is talking about... I went to sleep last night, I work as hard as I can-a I bring home my money, you take my money, give it to another man I should have quite you, baby-a, oh, such a long time ago-ho I wouldn't be hear with all my troubles nn-down on this killin' floor Squeeze me, babe, 'till the juice runs down my leg Do, squeeze, squeeze me, baby, until the juice runs down my leg The way you squeeze my lemon-a I'm gonna fall right outta bed, 'ed, 'ed, bed, yeah Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larry Posted April 17, 2009 Share Posted April 17, 2009 If Olga comes to the US, she can make a pretty good living doing that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skinsfan07 Posted April 17, 2009 Share Posted April 17, 2009 This is Olga. Is that really her? Dayummmm She could have her way with me too! Guy must have been ghey to turn down some free poontang pi, as well as getting paid, AND getting some new clothes afterwards. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PokerPacker Posted April 17, 2009 Share Posted April 17, 2009 Is that really her? DayummmmShe could have her way with me too! Guy must have been ghey to turn down some free poontang pi, as well as getting paid, AND getting some new clothes afterwards. don't think so. Now I don't know Russian, but I think these may be her: http://life.ru/news/63330 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baculus Posted April 17, 2009 Share Posted April 17, 2009 For some reason I don't buy the story, but can anyone read Russian? I mean, you know, I'm just curious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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