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Meals Ready To Excrete

Soldiers serve up amusing mixed reviews of military grub-in-a-bag

AUGUST 20--Next year, the U.S. military will begin production of a new line of Meals, Ready-to-Eat, those indestructible chow packages that help sustain American soldiers. MREs, which are distributed to servicemen during operations where regular meal preparation is not possible, are packaged to last for three years (or six months in 100 degree temperatures). The new MREs were developed, in part, after a late-2005 taste test involving 400 soldiers stationed at Fort Greeley in Alaska. Each serviceman involved in the field evaluation filled out comment forms, which were then compiled in a report prepared by Department of Defense officials. A copy of that entertaining document, filled with the blunt appraisals of junior Frank Brunis, can be found below. Eight complete meals were tested, with mixed results. One soldier complained that a chicken and dumplings MRE triggered, "a flatulence symphony in my tent all night." A stuffed cabbage MRE led one evaluator to exclaim, "The meal sucked! Do you even try this crap before you give it to us?" That same MRE also led another reviewer to write, "Don't ever give the stuffed cabbage to a soldier again, even POWs deserve better." One evaluator questioned whether the new MREs should actually be tested by non-military diners: "Soldiers will eat all of this nastiness no matter what, because we have to eat." Not all reviews were negative, however, especially when it came to a chicken loaf MRE with a tasty dessert. "The vanilla pudding is so good that I ripped it open. Licked the inside and rolled around on top of it like a dog," one enthusiastic soldier noted.

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it is kind of funny-

I like so many different types of food that I actually enjoyed our MREs. then again, they are USAF MRE so probably better than any of the other services! :cheers:

You've obviously never had to eat MREs for months at a time.....and I'm pretty sure MREs are MREs. They don't make them service-specific.

Some of the comments were pretty funny. No idea why they'd test them at Ft. Greeley though. Those guys are already pissed off from being at Ft. Greeley :laugh:

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You've obviously never had to eat MREs for months at a time.....and I'm pretty sure MREs are MREs. They don't make them service-specific.

Some of the comments were pretty funny. No idea why they'd test them at Ft. Greeley though. Those guys are already pissed off from being at Ft. Greeley :laugh:

exactly I lived on a steady diet of MRE's for months at a time and if I hadnt needed the calories I would have preffered wet dirt and poison berries

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exactly I lived on a steady diet of MRE's for months at a time and if I hadnt needed the calories I would have preffered wet dirt and poison berries

No doubt. I'm good until I get through the whole selection for the 3rd or 4th time. By the 2nd time through, I've already eliminated about 50% of the meals because they're nasty. By the 3rd and 4th time I'm down to 2 or 3 meals that even sound remotely appetizing.

They have come a long way in the last 15-20 years though, I'll give em that.

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I remember my favorite was the Chicken a la King. The least favorite was the piece of reddish colored, rubber coated, slab of masonry they called Strawberry shortcake. Cut only with an M-16 or higher caliber cutting utensil. If I had chewed that thing hard enough, I think I could have pulled my own wisdom teeth.

Though I will say that I did eat 3 of the things, (every last bit of them), in one sitting one late afternoon after a particularly grueling day of maneuvers against the Para Rescue guys,(fortunately, surgery was avoided).

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