Hard Knocks Next to Last Episode

[Reaganaut]

(Scene: Jerry Jones sits quietly talking with Joe Avazanno in the back of his plane and blows his nose into a hankerchief. He's got a bad cold and coughs alot)

Joe: Your secretary told me that you blew off a call from Dan Snyder this morning and that he had a few choice words for her..."

Jerry: This darn cold is really bothering me and I had a headache at the time. I would have taken the call from him, but I'll call him on Saturday night.

Joe: He's pissed isn't he?

Jerry: Look, he's young and Bill Parcells eats guys like him for lunch on a regular basis.

Joe: So that's how he got so f**king fat.

Jerry (grinning) Watch it Joe! You are going to start me on another coughing fit again. Bill likes to enjoy life, just like Campo. Snyder has learned some hard lessons, but Parcells would never coach for the Redskins - ever.

Joe: What makes you think the Cowboys are any different?

Jerry: I told him I'd stay in the owners box - but only for him.

Joe: Jerry, he's pulling your f**king leg here. The guy needs to be jerked off like a horny teenager every off-season.

Jerry: You don't sound so confident when you say that... he's gonna bring in for another special teams guy you know. Don't worry, though, you're in the front office no matter what happens.

Joe: S**t, I'll start to get worried when I see him eating salads at lunch. He's a real prick Jerry, I don't know if I could even work for him on the outside chance he accepts.

Jerry: Well, you two are going to have to get along if we can get him to jump on this.

Joe: Look, if he starts winning with the bums on this team, I'll kiss his friggin' Superbowl Rings. And then he can kiss mine.

Jerry: The plane's about to land, I need to make sure Dave's at my office.

Joe: If he hasn't downed a couple hundred sleeping pills beforehand...

Jerry: You're an a**hole Joe.

Joe: Aw s**t Jerry, the guy's a friend of mine too. I think I'm gonna call Norv tonight and wish Wannstedt and him good luck this weekend.

Jerry: So you've got a crystal ball here then.

Joe: I'm just sayin' Jerry. The guy's a prick and he does this every year. I'll put a hundred on it now that Norv Turner will be standing on the sideline with us next year.

Jerry: Then make it five hundred Joe.

Joe: No, how 'bout we really make it interesting... a weekend in Vegas with some hookers, I'll pay for the entire trip including gas for the plane.

Jerry (Shaking head): Sometimes I wonder why I keep you around here Joe.

Joe: Because you know you love it. You may not wanna say it, but you secretly want to be me.

Jerry: That's it Joe, you got me all figured out. (Cough cough cough nose blowing)

[The Evil Genius]

Thank you - you have made my XMas!

:notworthy

[Reaganaut]

Thanks EG. Will have another installment next Monday, but it will depend on what happens in the game.