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Dad...


MissU28

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Last night my sister-in-law and I were at the airport in Vegas getting ready to fly back to San Diego...and my brother called. He told me that our aunt Nikki had called him and told him that our dad was in the hospital...and that he'd been there since Saturday. When I asked why he was in there, I was told liver failure.

My brother and I are flying out to Tampa tomorrow morning and I don't know how long we'll be staying. I'm not looking forward to it...it's going to be depressing and the outlook for my dad really isn't good. The hospital is recommending hospice care or assisted living.

My parents got divorced when I was 12. When I was a child I didn't get along with my dad at all. I was spoiled and my brother was the one who got all the attention from him. We are both very stubborn, and I get a lot of my "wild" traits from him...people that are too alike fight a lot. When we lived in Thailand my mom, my brother, and I lived in Bangkok and my dad was working in a different city, so he wasn't around a whole bunch.

After my dad moved out, he moved to Reston...then down to Florida. I visited him once when I was 15, and my dad tried very hard to make my time there fun...even though it was just me and him in his one bedroom apartment and there wasn't much to do.

Over the years my dad and I started to create a stronger relationship over the phone...he would call me and apologize to me, crying, about how our relationship was when I was a child. Of course I forgave him. Every time I would answer the phone he would be very interested in my life and ask a lot of questions, and we'd end up laughing together. I could always talk to him about things I wouldn't talk to my mom about. Every time he calls he asks if I have a boyfriend and I know he's very eager to hear if I'm happy.

I've seen my dad about 4 times in the past 10 years. The last time I saw him was in January for my brother's wedding...he flew all the way out to San Diego despite his lack of funds and lack of good health. It meant a lot to everyone for him to be there.

Until recently, he would call me, my mom, and my brother and sound very depressed. He then started going back to church and got a cat, and his mood improved greatly...it was so much nicer to hear him on the phone in a good mood and laughing.

I called my dad this morning at the hospital. He sounded very tired but despite his condition, he sounded happy that we were flying out to see him. Even if he could get a liver transplant, he wouldn't want it. I'm sure when we see him he will talk about everything matter-of-factly and he won't be scared. I don't know what to expect when I go down to Tampa tomorrow. I don't know how I will handle it. I'm staying longer than my brother since he has to go back to work and since I have the summer off...but staying down in Tampa...alone...in the hospital with my very sick dad....I don't know. I can only tell him that I love him and hope God does what is best for him.

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Wow, you really touched me with your post MissU. I almost feel a tear coming out. I will defiently pray for your dad as well as you and your family. Hopefully everything turns out for the best. Im sure your presence their as well as your brothers will make him very happy and give him even more of a reason to keep fighting. I sincerly wish you and your family the best and remember yall are in our prayers. With the grace of God, im sure your dad will be fine. Safe flight and if possible please keep us updated. God Bless.

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I know how you feel, cause I lost my dad last year on Feburary 1st and my mom on March 27th of this year, because she couldn't get over losing my dad

But try to remember this too, at least you will be there for your dad when he needs you. Sadly, I wasn't with my dad when he died because we all though he was gonna get better and so only one of my older brothers was there with him when it happened

And also, be greatful that you and your dad did make up for the past and did spend time together.

Be there for your dad

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Wow...very heartfelt. Thanks for sharing that. I hope you and he, and everyone, can find a way to be at peace with whatever decisions are made and I hope it all works out as best it can.

Be strong. We're just a message board, but we're all behind you. I'll be thinking about your dad. And you. Take care.

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If he decides to opt out of the liver transplant, there is nothing you can do about it. Flying out to meet him is a generous gesture, hopefully to make the rest of the time you have with him special. Thank you for sharing something so personal, we all wish for the best.

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Robin -- my thoughts will be with you and your dad...I hope he's okay. My dad had a stroke due to a blood clot in his lung a few years ago, and its definitely a very scary feeling. I hope he is okay...

']I don't have any words' date=' brother.[/quote']

That's a sister, brother...;)

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You've handled this situation far better than many people I know. First, not holding a grudge for how things might have been when you were younger. Second, taking the time and making the effort to be with him now. You'll thank yourself a million times for how you've responded. My thoughts are with your family, I hope for the best.

Good Job you're a fine daughter.

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