Trying Is The First Step Toward Failure....and other words of inspiration

[Extreme]

I just heard a Homer Simpson wav file where he says trying is the first step toward failure. i busted out laughinf, but immediately realized Dice Clay and Carlin have both come up with a million of these things, and I'm sure everyone in here has heard some the rest of us haven't.

some others that come to mind are:

if it ain't broke, break it and walk away.

whoever said winning isn't everything was a loser.

whoever said money can't buy happiness never had enough money to try.

it's not whether you win or lose, it's whether or not you can kick the guy's ass and **** his wife.

[ashburnskinsfan]

Until you spread your wings, you never know how far you can walk.

[ashburnskinsfan]

http://www.despair.com/viewall.html

has them all on calendars, posters etc.

[Extreme]

Until you spread your wings, you never know how far you can walk.

thats pretty good

[Larry]

My favorite from Despair is:

Consulting:

If you're not part of the solution,

there's good money to be made in prolonging the problem

[techboy]

Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you do criticize him, you'll be a mile away and you'll have his shoes.

[dfitzo53]

Eagles may soar, but weasels never get sucked into jet engines.

Take it easy. And if you're getting it easy, take it twice.

When life gives you lemons, find someone with vodka.

[Major Harris]

if winning isn't everything, why doesn't anyone go for the bronze?

[Leonard Washington]

There is an island of opportunity in the middle of every difficulty. Miss that, though, and you're pretty much doomed.

[Larry]

The early bird catches the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

[Extreme]

When life gives you lemons, find someone with vodka.

indeed

[Mickalino]

Studies show that marriage is the leading cause of divorce.

[Mickalino]

I'm going to attend my friend's "Preliminary Divorce Proceeding"......also known as his wedding.

[IONTOP]

The early bird catches the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

nice...

Asking is the first step towards rejection...

[techboy]

Studies show that marriage is the leading cause of divorce.

Actually, there's apparently some truth to this. I took a Sociology of Marriage class about 10 or 12 years ago, and one of the things the professor shared with us is that the reason the divorce rate in the U.S. is so high (near 50%) is that there are a lot of people getting married (and divorced) multiple times. He told us that the stat was misleading because the rate of re-marriage is actually higher than the rate of marriage. In other words, a person who's been divorced at least once is more likely to get married than one never married at all!

"I'm always on the lookout for the next ex-Mrs. Malcom"

[cjcdaman]

Finishing in second place means you are the first loser.

Anyone who says beauty is on the inside is one ugly mother****er.

[IONTOP]

Finishing in second place means you are the first loser.

Anyone who says beauty is on the inside is one ugly mother****er.

Beauty may be on the inside, but ugly goes all the way to the bone....

[Big Weirdo]

Every silver lining has a dark cloud.

[Mickalino]

Every silver lining has a dark cloud.

Every Redskin message board is stuck with at least one Philly fan. :laugh:

[Pete]

The only way to find out how far you can lean a motorcycle is to fall off....................... then you know for sure.

[DieselPwr44]

Rehab is for quitters.....

[DeanCollins]

unless you pull your head out of your ass, you will continue to experiene the same old :pooh:

[Raub]

Knowledge is power....

Power corrupts....

So knowledge corrupts?

[TradeTheBeal!]

Knowledge is power....

Power corrupts....

So knowledge corrupts?

Yes and...

No!

It's not if you win or lose, it's how you play the game...and then again you might be a Philadelphia Eagle!

[jrockster21]

My favorite from Despair is:

Consulting:

If you're not part of the solution,

there's good money to be made in prolonging the problem

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:

That's how I'm going to retire, brother!! :laugh: :rotflmao: