What Attributes do you need in a Mate?

[PleaseBlitz]

Number 1 above anything is sense of humor. If you're hilarious you can make up for a lot.

Coming in at a close second is how the guy carries himself. Confidence.

Non-Physical

very intelligent

THOUGHTFUL

on time

calls when he says he will

trustworthy

honest

charismatic

has a nice balance of wanting to go out/stay at home- no party maniacs

Damn, i was 7 for 7 and then i ran head-on into that one. :gus:

:laugh:

[ashburnskinsfan]

I will have to disagree with you. I'm not going to get into an arguement over it, but so far as I am concerned a family is like a business, there MUST be a SINGLE PERSON at the top who makes the final decisions and has veto power on everything. Committee rule doesn't work in business and it works even less well in a family.

Unfortunately, that's not really a reasonably feasible concept for legal reasons.

Well ... likewise ... there's no point arguing with someone who doesn't understand the issue.

I've been happily married for nearly 17 years, and by your own admission you can't hold down a relationship for more than a few weeks.

I think I have a better handle on how marriage and successful relationships work.

[Mass_SkinsFan]

Yeah, well if you are looking at it as a biz transaction, going into a relationship w/o love or at least mutual respect, is going to cost you A LOT more on the back end, if you know what i mean......like HALF.

LOL. That's why the appropriate legal paperwork needs to be filled out before any marriage takes place. WAY too many men forget that. They get tied up in the emotions and other crap, forget to protect themselves and their assets, and end up paying for it in the end.

[gchwood]

For the same reason that marriages occured for hundreds of years before the idea of "love" got involved and screwed things up..... Marriage is traditionally a BUSINESS TRANSACTION. Look at history if you think I'm out of my mind. This idea of marrying for "love" is a pretty new thing, historically speaking.

Life is just fine without love, actually. It's an emotion that brings a whole lot more hurt and despair than anything useful.

Well Sex was considered a "business transaction" as well, it was used for procreation only

[CrazyZeb]

LOL. That's why the appropriate legal paperwork needs to be filled out before any marriage takes place. WAY too many men forget that. They get tied up in the emotions and other crap, forget to protect themselves and their assets, and end up paying for it in the end.

You're one romantic son of a *****. :laugh:

[PleaseBlitz]

LOL. That's why the appropriate legal paperwork needs to be filled out before any marriage takes place. WAY too many men forget that. They get tied up in the emotions and other crap, forget to protect themselves and their assets, and end up paying for it in the end.

I want a 3% brokers fee Mass.

Russian Mail Order Brides:

http://www.loveme.com/

[MissU28]

Damn, i was 7 for 7 and then i ran head-on into that one. :gus:

:laugh:

into party maniacs? I just don't want a guy who wants to go out clubbing every weekend and all he wants to do is party...i mean i can definitely hold my own in the partying world, but I'm out of college-mode and I expect my guy to be too.

[Darth Tater]

I can say that every divorced person I know, married the other person because they were 'in love' with that person not that they loved the person.

[Mass_SkinsFan]

Well ... likewise ... there's no point arguing with someone who doesn't understand the issue.

I've been happily married for nearly 17 years, and by your own admission you can't hold down a relationship for more than a few weeks.

I think I have a better handle on how marriage and successful relationships work.

I will disagree that I don't understand the issue. I just see it very differently than you do. Congratulations on 17 years of marriage. Obviously you have a very different view of what a relationship is supposed to be than I do. My parents would have been married 36 years this coming July if my father hadn't died of Cancer in 2001. They lived 31 years in a relationship much closer to what I am looking for than what I would guess yours is like. So don't tell me it doesn't work or can't be done.

[Mass_SkinsFan]

You're one romantic son of a *****. :laugh:

Yes and no. I can be very "romantic" when it is called for and it is deserved. I can also be an ego-maniacal madman with a huge temper when it's called for. I just don't believe in love. Love and romance are two very different things.

[DarthSidious]

After the past few years, I need a non faker

Someone who when I invite them out doesn't have something "come up" at the last minute.

Unfourtantley you do that once with me now and its pretty much over in my book, I have had that happen waaaaaaaaaay too much to me the last few years

On time also.... HUGE. 9 pm means 9 pm, not 12 am

As far as attributes, I have always liked taller girls, someone who loves to laugh, and really someone who will do just about anything, anything being get out of your little bubble that you have had your whole life

I personally find myself lucky because I can find myself in 3 different situations in 3 different nights, a club downtown, some dive bar, the movies, whatever it may be, I can adapt to pretty much any situation

Id like to find a woman who could do that

And most importantly.................... gotta be hot

Don't forget a Skins fan too SHF.

[HOF44]

I can also be an ego-maniacal madman with a huge temper.

This is what should start off your personals add!!!!!

[Mass_SkinsFan]

I want a 3% brokers fee Mass.

Russian Mail Order Brides:

LOL. I actually looked into that sort of thing at one time. Unfortunately the more I looked into it, the less I found any reasonable candidates. More importantly, since Sept. 11, 2001 the US Government has paid a lot more attention to foreign nationals coming into the country solely for marriage purposes.

[CandaceM23]

LOL. That's why the appropriate legal paperwork needs to be filled out before any marriage takes place. WAY too many men forget that. They get tied up in the emotions and other crap, forget to protect themselves and their assets, and end up paying for it in the end.

No offense ... but your list is a little out there ...

And this whole business transaction / appropriate legal paperwork deal is lovely too.

Good luck finding her .... :doh:

[CrazyZeb]

LOL. I actually looked into that sort of thing at one time. Unfortunately the more I looked into it, the less I found any reasonable candidates. More importantly, since Sept. 11, 2001 the US Government has paid a lot more attention to foreign nationals coming into the country solely for marriage purposes.

This'll be fun, I'm going to find you a candidate.

[twenty-eight]

Number 1 above anything is sense of humor. If you're hilarious you can make up for a lot.

Coming in at a close second is how the guy carries himself. Confidence.

Non-Physical

very intelligent

THOUGHTFUL

on time

calls when he says he will

trustworthy

honest

charismatic

has a nice balance of wanting to go out/stay at home- no party maniacs

non-smoker, non-druggie

redskins fan

can play basketball

has goals, a steady job, and has graduated college

Very manly men.... likes to watch sports, fix cars, fish, golf, do "manly" things

can be very silly and easygoing- not uptight

responsible

freaky (that's where my wink goes)

Physical

tall (6'1 and above...not necessary, but definitely a plus...at LEAST over 5'10)

athletic

attractive face

not obese

and that's pretty much my list for physical....

I don't really have a "type"...I used to, but now I like who I like and it just happens.

DAMN! I was so close :40oz:.....pass the pipe

[gchwood]

LOL. That's why the appropriate legal paperwork needs to be filled out before any marriage takes place. WAY too many men forget that. They get tied up in the emotions and other crap, forget to protect themselves and their assets, and end up paying for it in the end.

See you are ****izing the covenant of marriage! Marriage is about unconditional love and respect, self sacrifice, and commitment. If you don't have all of those the marraige fails

[Mass_SkinsFan]

This is what should start off your personals add!!!!!

I don't do the personal ad thing anymore. Tried it in college (Providence, RI). Tried it when I lived in Connecticut (Hartford & New Haven). Tried it a number of years ago here in Massachusetts.

I can truthfully say that not one relationship with a person I got matched up with through the personal ads (and a dating service I tried at one point) lasted more than 3 dates. In fact several of them didn't even survive to the scheduled end of the first date.

[PleaseBlitz]

This'll be fun, I'm going to find you a candidate.

Just photoshop Edith Bunkers head to Jessica Albas body, then put her in handcuffs, and we'll have a winner.

[Henry]

I will disagree that I don't understand the issue. I just see it very differently than you do. Congratulations on 17 years of marriage. Obviously you have a very different view of what a relationship is supposed to be than I do. My parents would have been married 36 years this coming July if my father hadn't died of Cancer in 2001. They lived 31 years in a relationship much closer to what I am looking for than what I would guess yours is like. So don't tell me it doesn't work or can't be done.

Hmm ... I wonder, did your parents tell you every time they had a fight? Did you they let you know every time they were unhappy?

I think first-hand knowledge is a little more valuble in this particular discussion.

[Ghost of]

Good luck on that one, big guy.

Not at all difficult. Depending on what one's subjective evaluation of highly intelligent is, it becomes even easier.

My ex-gf's family runs that way. Mom has plenty of power, but Pops is the head of the family. For many religious ANd non-religious people, this is a reality and one in which the woman is not debased or abused.

My ex-gf is headed to medical school, will be caring for the poor and sick in places around the world and will also accept a 'subordinate' role in her marriage, only in the sense that the husband will be the head of the house. If a man is too weak to handle that role, she's not going to be with him. (and if a man is too weak for that, in general, he's going to have a hard time out there.)

Now maybe Mass means something else, but a lot of people have been poisoned by pop culture and pop sociology. It's OK for one person to take the lead because, generally, the other exerts their influence and contributes in MORE ways.

[Predicto]

I will have to disagree with you. I'm not going to get into an arguement over it, but so far as I am concerned a family is like a business, there MUST be a SINGLE PERSON at the top who makes the final decisions and has veto power on everything. Committee rule doesn't work in business and it works even less well in a family.

.

Works great in my family.

Of course, I had the b*lls to marry a woman who is as intelligent and strongwilled as I am. We battle a bit, that's for sure, but we have each other's back and it's us against the world.

[Ghost of]

No offense ... but your list is a little out there ...

And this whole business transaction / appropriate legal paperwork deal is lovely too.

With the anti-male family courts, only a FOOL who had assets would get married without protecting what he brought into the marriage.

(and to be honest, a woman who was bringing assets/wealth in, would be too.)

Apparently, you haven't heard enough stories about what goes on when people don't protect themselves.

it's not about 'trust' because that's what gets the suckers. It's about being smart and protecting yourself if your spouse goes nuts on you. Plenty of good men and women looked up and saw the one they 'trusted' running off or doing some other damn-fool thing.

[Mass_SkinsFan]

No offense ... but your list is a little out there ...

And this whole business transaction / appropriate legal paperwork deal is lovely too.

Good luck finding her .... :doh:

Candace, I understand that what I am looking for is not what most modern American women aspire to or are taught they should be. I understand that my view is "out there" and not the societal norm. I also understand that it's what I am looking for. I'd rather be alone than to be in a relationship of a type I don't agree with.

[SkinsNut73]

Here's a fairly complete listing of what I look for in a woman....

Physical Attributes:

Above 5'2" and below 5'8"

Caucasian

Non-blonde only

C cup or larger

Appropriately feminine natural physical appearance

Appropriately feminine style of dress

Acceptance of a high level of physical intimacy

Non-Physical Attributes:

Acceptance of a subordinate role in the relationship

Ability to cook and perform other domestic tasks

Highly intelligent

Level-Headed

Calm & Not prone to emotional swings/outbursts

That's a pretty solid basic quick list of what I look for.

Basic quick list? Talk about narrowing your choices down, eh? You even have the height and hair color picked out? I'm wondering what your "extensive" list also includes? Interesting to say the least. It just seems like you might eliminate a good "marriage candidate" because you are too picky??? To each his own....just sayin'

....and even if you did find someone with most of those attributes, I can pretty much guarantee you that there is not a woman on the face of the planet who can meet this qualification:

Calm & Not prone to emotional swings/outbursts

Ever heard of PMS?

For me, I never had a pre-determined list or anything like that. Like zoony said, I just kind of fell in love with my wife because she had a lot of nice attributes...and big boobs.