Westbrook36 Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 In one of a billion other lives, Wilmer Valderrama would toil his life away in the coffee and oil fields of Venezuela, have a tiny penis, and get beat up in school. Instead, thanks to America, this is his life. Valderrama talks about sexWilmer Valderrama talked about his Hollywood conquests during an appearance on Howard Stern yesterday. Among his revelations were that Lindsay Lohan was one of the best girl's he's ever had slept with, Ashlee Simpson was loud in bed and Jennifer Love Hewitt rated an "eight" out of ten when it came to sex. He also claimed that he's been with two women at once and engaged in anal sex with a famous actress, who he refused to name. Valderrama claims his penis is "slightly bigger" than eight inches, and that he's videotaped his sexual escapades on numerous occasions, but erased the tapes to keep them from being linked on the internet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheSteve Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 I don't even know who this guy is, and I don't care. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heidenreich Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 Of all those dumb skanks listed, only Jennifer Love Hewitt depresses me..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MoeRedskins Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 I never liked the dude, and reading that only made me dislike him even more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grimm Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 I have been sending him my hate for years now, I wish he was never spawned upon this planet Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elkabong82 Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 So, Fez is the next Maccio? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoony Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 Gee thanks, now I hate him too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PleaseBlitz Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 Of all those dumb skanks listed, only Jennifer Love Hewitt depresses me..... Im with you man. Ashlee Simpson looks like a horse, but with less talent. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QBkilla56 Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 FESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ghost of Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 In one of a billion other lives, Wilmer Valderrama would toil his life away in the coffee and oil fields of Venezuela, have a tiny penis, and get beat up in school. Instead, thanks to America, this is his life. That was hilarious! :laugh: I agree wit' you. What's hilarious to me is he's not even a big star whose fame or wealth compensates for his innate lameness. And I'm secure enough in my manhood to be an objective judge of the competition. I don't get the appeal, but then I'm guessing Lohan, Barely Sing Simpson and the like aren't exactly discriminating in their romantic choices. I need to get started on my H-Dub career already. This 'normie' gig is putting a serious cramp in my style. If I were famous (and calling this cat famous is a stretch,) if this dude is any indication, I'd be pulling (if I desired) so much tail I'd be physically burned out before I even hit 30. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PleaseBlitz Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 I need to get started on my H-Dub career already. This 'normie' gig is putting a serious cramp in my style. If I were famous (and calling this cat famous is a stretch,) if this dude is any indication, I'd be pulling (if I desired) so much tail I'd be physically burned out before I even hit 30. When you break it big in H-town, can I be Turtle? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheLongshot Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 Actually, I think Lindsay Lohan is a nice piece of ass, at least when she isn't starving herself. Jason Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ghost of Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 When you break it big in H-town, can I be Turtle? Sure. I have nothing against buds getting my run-off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
macnoke03 Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 Actually, I think Lindsay Lohan is a nice piece of ass, at least when she isn't starving herself.Jason very true...she was very sexy before she went anorexic (sp?) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ghost of Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 very true...she was very sexy before she went anorexic (sp?) I think she gained some of her weight back. back to "hit" mode, if you will. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iheartskins Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 Sure. I have nothing against buds getting my run-off. I'm happy and qualified to be E. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leonard Washington Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 i hope he doesn't have that lisp in real life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxito Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 In one of a billion other lives, Wilmer Valderrama would toil his life away in the coffee and oil fields of Venezuela, have a tiny penis, and get beat up in school. Instead, thanks to America, this is his life. your're just jealous arn't you. J/k. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoony Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 your're just jealous arn't you. J/k. yah, so? JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT!!!! :cuss: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
frankbones Posted March 29, 2006 Share Posted March 29, 2006 LOL what a bunch of haters. If you have a chacns listen to the interview, one of Stern's best on Sirius. Good for Wilmer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissU28 Posted March 29, 2006 Share Posted March 29, 2006 I think she gained some of her weight back. back to "hit" mode, if you will. :laugh: "hit" mode. Classic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Westbrook36 Posted March 29, 2006 Author Share Posted March 29, 2006 This is why I hate him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PleaseBlitz Posted March 29, 2006 Share Posted March 29, 2006 When you break it big in H-town, can I be Turtle? I'm happy and qualified to be E. Now we just need a Drama, and we'll be all set. :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
21KO Posted March 29, 2006 Share Posted March 29, 2006 This is why I hate him. dear lord. Not to name drop or anything, but I worked on "I Know What You Did Last Summer". Her and Sarah Michelle. Young. Voluptuous. make me dog-water. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TradeTheBeal! Posted March 29, 2006 Share Posted March 29, 2006 Lohan and Hewitt are A+ quality stuff. Stern should have given him a list of Scarlet Johansson, Cristina Ricci, and Natalie Portman and said "come back in 2 months with a full report"! Why hate on the guy? Pullin' the wool is what it's all about when you're 20-27 and you have a strong rep! Wilmer, I salute you!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.