PiLfan

Just in: Judge overseeing the divorce of Jeff and MacKenzie Bezos to decide who gets custody of Amazon's warehouse employees...

Old Trump: "Mexico will pay for the wall!" New Trump: "Furloughed government workers will build the wall for food."

With Reed, Davis and Doctson all likely out, Crowder and CT still banged up and/or barely productive, and an OL that is at scab depth chart levels, who is Josh going to throw to? Garden gnomes? Titans - 34 Scabs - 3

BREAKING: Scientists announced that they have found the remains of what they believe to be the largest prehistoric predatory cargo plane ever discovered. Called the Lockheed C-5 Megaloton, it terrorized the skies about 20-25 million years ago during the early Miocene period, often devouring other, smaller planes.

Getting some Christmas gifts for the kids. Hope they like poo...

This was my first time making the Thanksgiving turkey. It didn't go real well...

I think the strangest, most random part of "Scarface" is when the Terminator just all of a sudden shows up at the end and shoots Tony Montana in the back. Like, WTF?

I respect Virginia for trying hard to court after Amazon and all, but I think paving over Jefferson Davis Highway in solid gold and renaming it "Bezos Driveway" was a bit much.

The best part of the doctored Acosta video is where they inserted the Wilhelm scream.

BREAKING: Amazon says it will no longer use leg shackles and cattle prods on its warehouse employees.

And that's when I just felt like writing an Op-ed piece for the New York Times.

Malt vinegar especially. Smells like when a guy takes off his shoes after running a marathon.

The QAnon story of Donald Trump secretly fighting a global pedophilia ring is obviously a hoax. The story of Abe Lincoln secretly fighting a confederate army of vampires, on the other hand, is totally true (and ****ing awesome).