• Blog Entries

    • By JimmiJo in ES Coverage
         1

       
      Trapped
       
      Hello my friends. JimmiJo here. I am joined by my partner; Spaceman Spiff. Together we will bring you the sights and sounds of today's match between the Washington Redskins and San Francisco 49ers. 
       
      This game has all the markings of the classic 'trap' game. The Washington Redskins are hosted an 0-5 San Francisco 49ers; a squad desperate for a win.
       
      The Redskins don't fare well is such games, if history if any game. No, not actual history; but history according to Pappas. I remember witnessing an 0-5 Titans leave with a win. I recall Washington allowing Detroit, who were hosting 18-straight losses, to get well.
       
      Bingo!
       
      But we must consider this Redskins' team is a different deal. These guys are playing with an attitude.
       
      Having Josh Norman out hurts. But it looks like Trent Williams is active and we will see if he starts (betcha he does).
       
      Stand by...
       
      Inactives
       
      The Redskins declared the following players as inactive:
      o   No. 20 RB Rob Kelley
      o   No. 22 S Deshazor Everett
      o   No. 24 CB Josh Norman
      o   No. 40 LB Josh Harvey-Clemons
      o   No. 72 DL Anthony Lanier II
      o   No. 79 T Ty Nsekhe
      o   No. 87 TE Jeremy Sprinkle
       
      No. 25 Chris Thompson is expected to start in place of Kelley at running back.
      No. 35 Montae Nicholson is expected to start in place of Everett at safety.
      No. 47 Quinton Dunbar is expected to start in place of Norman at cornerback.
       
      The 49ers declared the following players as inactive:
      o   No. 10 WR Kendrick Bourne
      o   No. 20 CB Leon Hall
      o   No. 27 DB Dexter McCoil
      o   No. 44 FB Kyle Juszczyk
      o   No. 56 LB Reuben Foster
      o   No. 62 OL Erik Magnuson
      o   No. 97 LB Dekoda Watson
       
      Keys to the Game
       
      Punch them in the mouth early. Use the run to set up play-action. Disruptive pressure on defense. Win the turnover battle.
       
      Here's to a good game with no injuries. 
       
      Follow along in-game on Twitter @Skinscast. 
       
      Half
       
      Redskins are doing well, dominating all statistical categories. But the let down at the end of the game resulted in at least a 4-point giveaway. FOr the second straight game, individual players on the defense are finding ways to extend drive.
       
      Kirk Cousins finished the half 15-for-21 for 201-yards, 2 touchdowns and an interception and a 130.55 rating.
       
      For San Francisco, disarray is the word of the day. Brian Hoyer has been benched for C.J. Beathard, grandson to Bobby Beathard. Beathard just found a way to get 7 on the board.
       
      The 49ers get the ball to start the half. 
       
      JimmiJo
       
      They just had to make it interesting.
       
      After a fairly domination first 28-minutes of the game, things changed for the Washington Redskins. Washington was holding a comfortable 17-0 lead when the San Francisco 49ers sent rookie quarterback C.J. Beathard in the game.
       
      All he did was march the team down for a touchdown at the end of the half.
       
      He then led a field goal drive to start the second half, and then a touchdown following Vernon Davis’ fumble.
       
      That tied the game tied at 17. Redskins fans were dismayed, but hardly surprised.
       
      Washington woke up in the fourth quarter; adding a field goal to go up three, and then another six on a Kirk Cousins read-option scamper.
       
      It was a bad omen when kicker Dustin Hopkins missed the extra point.
       
      Cousins finished the day 25-of-37 for 330-yards, 2 touchdowns and 1 interception with a quarterback rating of 102.3.
       
      Concern turned to nightmare when Beathard hit a wide open (and former Redskins receiver) Aldrick Robinson for a touchdown. Robinson was the beneficiary of a blown coverage that left him running free to the end zone, pulling San Francisco within 2.
       
      The niners would get another chance with under 2-minutes to play. Lacking timeouts, they made a run for it; advancing the ball to midfield before a penalties and dropped balls started to catch up to them.
       
      On the final meaningful play of the game, Kendall Fuller reached up and grabbed the interception to put away the game.
       
      Head Coach Jay Gruden said after the game something to the effect that it is a good sign when a team is not too happy when they get a win. That guys would find stuff not to like about the game.
       
      One writer told me he thought this meant the team is maturing.  I thought it meant that knew the 49ers stink and it should never have been so close.
       
      There was plenty not to like about this game. Surrendering a 17-point lead. Stupid personal fouls to give up first downs. Horrendous officiating.
       
      And once again, injuries.
       
      Bashaud Breelend is going to an MRI tomorrow to discover the extent of his knee problems.
       
      Gruden said Breeland will have an MRI Monday. Defensive Lineman Jonathan Allen suffered a foot-sprain. Montae Nicholson has a shoulder injury. Stefan McClure a knee sprain and Fabian Moreau hamstring tightness.
       
      But a win is a win and Washington will take it as they get ready to travel to Philadelphia for a rematch with the Eagles.
       
      Washington amassed 419 total yards of offense this game. They had 325-net yards passing and 94-yards rushing, with 6-different rushers used. Chris Thompson led all backs with 33 yards.
       
      Thompson finished the day as the leading receiver for the Redskins, totaling 105 yards on 4-receptions. He led a field of 9 different receivers.
      Washington’s defense finished the day with 3 sacks and 1 interception.
       
      Next week Washington faces division-leading Philadelphia Eagles at their place. This is a rematch of the Week 1 loss suffered at FedEx Field. They play Monday night.
       
      We will see you for the next home game.
       
       
       
       
       
       
       
       
       
       
       
       
       
       
       
       
       

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Son of Gadsden

THEONION: Mike Shanahan Trails Off During Speech About Turning Franchise Around

Recommended Posts

http://www.onionsportsnetwork.com/articles/mike-shanahan-trails-off-during-speech-about-turni,18649/

NIB-Redskins-Coach-R_jpg_635x345_crop-smart_upscale_q85.jpg

WASHINGTON—Head coach Mike Shanahan attempted but failed to address his players regarding the Redskins' future Monday, repeatedly trailing off during what he evidently had planned as an encouraging talk about the future of the franchise. "As shaky as we've looked this season, we've got a lot to, you know… We just have to, eh, ahem," said Shanahan, who started and stopped his speech several times and at one point actually stood up as if to leave before seeming to notice his players arranged around him listening. "What I'm trying to say is, we're just a few games from turning. From turning this thing over, I mean. No, around. Turning it back? Well, anyway, I'm gonna go." Shanahan then told his players that his door was always open before retiring to his office and shutting the door.terminator.gif

After the Locklear situation, this just got 10 times more hilarious. :ols:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
After the Locklear situation, this just got 10 times more hilarious. :ols:
Then I guess that I just don't have a sense of humor.:confused:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

there should probably be a "The Onion: article title" in the title of the thread because this is a parody and not actual journalism.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

OP, definitely change your title...it's funny how a lot of people don't realize the onion is 100% satire the first time they read it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

what the hell, 3 posts that aren't amused and 2 telling the op to change his title

this is funny as hell, come on, it's the onion, people. You'd laugh if it was about any other team, lighten up :/

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
what the hell, 3 posts that aren't amused and 2 telling the op to change his title

this is funny as hell, come on, it's the onion, people. You'd laugh if it was about any other team, lighten up :/

It has nothing to do with how humorous the article was (it was ok, not one of the Onion's better efforts).

I was giving him a friendly warning, which he didn't heed.

Too late now. He got NNT'ed.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I usually like The Onion's satire, but this wasn't that funny. Probably started off as funny in their head, but then trailed off into something unfunny. Get it?

Ok, I'll stop.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

These threads are MUCH better when the Onion isn't indicated in the thread title. Hopefully he didn't get NNT'd for that.

This isn't great Onion work though. Maybe should have written an article about Grossman giving an end of season speech but turning it over to other people during important points.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't really get the humor either. I've enjoyed Onion articles before, but I guess this one is over my head. Not sure why a national audience would take to this given the Redskins relative obscurity as we head into the off season..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
These threads are MUCH better when the Onion isn't indicated in the thread title. Hopefully he didn't get NNT'd for that.

This isn't great Onion work though. Maybe should have written an article about Grossman giving an end of season speech but turning it over to other people during important points.

Would be ridiculous if he got NNT'd. I love waiting for the 5 minute paragraph of why Shanny needs to be fired immediately after an embarrassing speech like that.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yeah, I thought i put (onion) at the end of the title, but i might have forgotten. I thought it would be funnier if people didn't initially read that it was a joke. Plus this is maybe my 3rd NT, and my first article. I knew the rules, so i posted the link and credited the author, but i guess i got the format wrong. Hoping I didn't get NNT'd, but if I did, okay. I can understand that all the bad posts I see can ruin it for everyone as far as mod tolerance. If not, i'll make sure i get the title right next time. so i support it either way.

Anyway, I thought it was funny, but with Onion, you either get it or you don't. I think being able to laugh at yourself (especially in these times of folly for our team) is important.

The humor i found in it was thinking about Shanny's state of mind after seeing some of these blocked field goals and such. Just some of the stupid **** that happened this season, you've got to think that he's just thinking "Yeah, in a few games...eh...uh...I'm just going to go to my office. What did i get myself into..." (for the record I think Shanahan is our guy until he decides to retire, and I love the direction the team is going) Wasn't meant to be the funniest joke in the world, but seeing as the regular season is over and we aren't in the playoffs, and I'm tired of reading the same old repetitive "Shanahan isn't the guy" or "Rex sucks!" or "We need a QB!" i tried to post something different. Not like there is anything better to talk about.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Pretty funny. :)

The Onion always does hard-hitting news...

If the onion doesn't have at least one article that makes you laugh, you have no soul. I liked the new one, can't remember where I saw it about Jacksonville burning down their stadium to collect the insurance ACV. xD

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
If the onion doesn't have at least one article that makes you laugh, you have no soul. I liked the new one, can't remember where I saw it about Jacksonville burning down their stadium to collect the insurance ACV. xD

http://www.onionsportsnetwork.com/articles/peyton-manning-shows-his-backup-proper-way-to-hold,2262/

This has always been my favorite for some reason... haha

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Shanahan then told his players that his door was always open before retiring to his office and shutting the door.terminator.gif

Ok, this was pretty funny.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

He might have trailed off, but at least he didn't have members of the armed forces give a rah rah speech.

That would have been worse.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ive come to realize that this franchise has become a joke, and I can find the humor in our misery. Obviously not everyone can take a lighthearted joke without feeling like someone insulted one of their family members.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.