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    • By thesubmittedone in ES Coverage 7
      Landover, MD - Welcome all to the Extremeskins coverage of the second preseason game. I'm TSO in the Press box providing you with the best damn coverage I and Spaceman Spiff, who will be providing coverage from the sidelines, possibly can! 
       
       
       
       
       
       
       
       
       
       
      1999 Redskins go 10-6 and win the NFC East. The following season? Failure. 
       
       
       
      2005 Redskins go 10-6 and nab a wildcard spot. The following season? Disaster.
       
       
       
      2007 Redskins go 9-7 and sneak into the playoffs. The following season? Zorn. 
       
       
       
      2012 Redskins go 10-6, win the NFC East with their shiny new franchise QB. The following season? Epic collapse. 
       
       
       
       
       
       
       
      So now, here we are. The Redskins are coming off a season that saw a seismic shift occur within the Front Office, where a legitimate talent-evaluating GM was hired to take control of the scouting department and personnel. Gruden got the help he desperately needed and asked for from the Front Office. The Redskins went 9-7 and miraculously won the NFC East on the heels of a young group of draft picks and a ton of personnel hits in general.
       
       
       
      So, the following season? 
       
       
       
      We're going to find out if this is real. 
       
       
       
      Is it? Is our newly and properly structured Front Office as organized and professional as it seems? Is it real?
       
       
       
      Is our energetic and smart coaching staff as good for player development as they were last season? Is it real?
       
       
       
      Is Kirk Cousins the franchise QB we've been so desperately lacking? Is he for real?
       
       
       
      Are the young players truly developing into a core of consistent championship potential?  Are they for real?
       
       
       
       
       
       
       
      It might just be the preseason, but these games play a role (albeit a small one) in teaching us who will rise to the occasion and who won't. Who will solidify their spot on the team and who will continue to remain a question. Who will be a part of the new reality we all hope is happening right before our eyes, a hope we continue to question is real?
       
       
       
      The hope that we're witnessing the rise of the Redskins as a perennial contender. 
       
       
       
      Let's start to find out together here on Extremeskins Gameday Coverage!  
       
       
       
       
       
       
         
       
       
       1st Quarter Analysis  
       
       
         
       
       
       
       
       
         
       
       
      Offensively, I think we finally saw the new Matt Jones (7 carries for 31 yards, 4.4 avg) we've heard about all offseason. Though the handoff gaffe was terrible, everything else was very pleasing to see. He had good vision, ran hard, and got whatever he could get on plays that the defense played well. Unfortunately, he got hurt and so his durability issues will, and should, come into question. Let's hope his left shoulder is okay.   
       
       
         
       
       
      Ryan Grant (3 for 3, 27 yards) and Jamison Crowder (3 of 4, 38 yards) also showed up well (well, on offense, Crowder's muffed punt was terrible to see but let's not forget this is his first live action of the year), but you really see why coaches love Grant. He's just very smooth and tough to cover.  
       
       
         
       
       
      Colt McCoy (7 of 9, 66 yards) looked great until the last play of the first drive, which was mind numbingly stupid. I actually think he was trying to throw it away. And that spin? Whoosh. That was fun to see.  
       
       
         
       
       
      As for the defense, the secondary keeps showing up. DHall was in on the first pass break up and Greg Toler had great coverage on the 3rd down.         
       
       
         
       
       
      I've noticed the last two games we've essentially never lined up in a 3-4. We basically have two Dlinemen inside (Reyes, Baker) and 2 OLB (Kerrigan, Preston).   
       
       
         
       
       
      The Oline looks totally different with Lauvao in terms of run-blocking. That is all.   
       
       
         
       
       
      Stay tuned for more after the half!     
       
       
         
       
       
       2nd Quarter Analysis  
       
       
         
       
       
       
       
       
         
       
       
      Dunbar was a busy bee. He gave up a bad pass against Decker on the first drive for Jets O in the 2nd. On their second drive, Dunbar makes up for it with a beautiful pass breakup. Their third drive, Dunbar gives up a 9 yard completion, but had tight coverage. Mixed bag, but certainly improved from last week's performance.   
       
       
         
       
       
      Reyes and Baker were struggling a bit on interior runs initially. 2nd drive for Jets O, Baker made a nice tackle on an interior run, so that was good. Baker also had with nice pressure causing incomplete pass on 3rd down.   
       
       
         
       
       
      Spaight has been extremely impressive to say the least. It's not just the caused fumble, he's the general of D. I've been watching him between breaks as well and he's constantly communicating with everyone, controlling the huddle. Doesn't look like a 2nd year player coming off of injury. He had a sick read on screen and tackle as well later on in the 2nd.  
       
       
         
       
       
      Jamison Crowder running more north-south on punts it seems.  
       
       
         
       
       
      Ross with a step, Colt throws deeper could've been big play on drive early in 2nd. Rashad Ross two nice plays on first TD drive. Super impressive 2nd TD from Rashad Ross, tackled head first but maintains possession, not easy for a small guy like him.    
       
       
         
       
       
      Safety on Spencer Long, hands seemed more on the shoulders lifting up the jersey right under the chin so it looked bad, nice play to Maurice Harris got nullified, a shame for a young guy like him. But Harris comes back and gets a 19 yard gain on a nice catch off play action.    
       
       
         
       
       
      Ihenacho on ensuing kickoff with nice tackle. Continues to show up on Special Teams.      
       
       
         
       
       
      Another Ryan Grant catch.    
       
       
         
       
       
      Golston veteran move on run with about 3:25 left in 2nd, just goes down to cause pile up and trips RB.   
       
       
         
       
       
      Blackmon savvy INT from Safety, don't know what Geno Smith was thinking, but Trail was close to applying pressure... could be Geno felt it.  
       
       
         
       
       
      Dashaun Phillips and Spaight nice zone trade off on drive late in 2nd quarter.  
       
       
         
       
       
      All in all, a very positive quarter for a lot of Redskins. Spaight (1 FF), Rashad Ross (4 on 5, 58 yards, 2 TD) and Colt McCoy (13 of 16, 159 yards, 2 TD) killed it.    
       
       
         
       
       
      Stay tuned for more!       
       
       
         
       
       
         
       
       
        3rd Quarter Analysis  
       
       
         
       
       
       
       
       
         
       
       
      Not a whole lot to see here, but I was excited about Stephen Paea coming on back to back plays to start the 3rd quarter off. He got good penetration on run and then a sack on the next play.  Then, Paea on the ensuing drive again penetrates nicely on back to back plays with solid rushes. He's a player I was hoping would improve from last game and I discussed that in length here:    
       
       
         
       
       
      Speaking of players I noticed, Anthony Lanier seems to have moved up on the depth chart as he was often playing with 2nd team in the 3rd quarter if my eyes didn't deceive me. 
      Reiter continues to impress. On run play where Marshall went for about 9 yards with slightly under 3 minutes left in the 3rd, he gets his first block accomplished and then passes him off and lands his second block, opening up a nice lane up.    
       
      Stay tuned for the 4th Quarter update!    
       
       4th Quarter Analysis
       
      Again, not much to discuss other than the obvious (Sudfeld with an awesome drive to win the game)... but here are a couple things I thought were interesting. 
      Fuller gives up long pass play to start the 4th but then recovers with three nice plays. He breaks up two passes and then makes the tackle on a 3rd and 2 to stop the Jets drive and force a FG.  
      Garvin continues to make plays, with a nice pass break up and then a pressure that resulted in an errant throw to force a Jets punt. Recovers fumble caused by Deshazor Everett on Jets drive that was moving easily by hustling.  As mentioned in my previous blog, he's been impressive. 
      Anthony Lanier with the sack to finish the game, love that guy!  
       
      Final impressions:
      So today's game clearly didn't go a long way in determining if this Redskins' resurgence is for real (or as much as any preseason game possibly could), considering many of the players who will play a massive role in said resurgence didn't play, but we did get to see who might potentially add their hats to the discussion. 
      And who are those guys?
      Aside from the obvious answers in Rashad Ross, Ryan Grant, Colt McCoy, Matt Jones and Martrell Spaight who absolutely killed it, there were guys like Anthony Lanier (check out the exclusive interview) who seemed to play a bigger role today on the Dline after showing up really well last week.
      Stephen Paea improved significantly upon his performance last week as well, often finding his way in the backfield of the opposition. Other players who improved from last week were Keith Marshall, Will Blackmon, and Morgan Moses. 
      Reiter continued to impress as did Maurice Harris who continues to be used with the second stringers, making him an interesting roster decision to follow considering how much depth there is at his position. 
      Unfortunately, there are some guys who continue to be questions moving forward and are nowhere near a "yes" on the "is it real" scale. Kuandjio continues to be a mixed bag who has a tough time finding any consistency as does Quinton Dunbar, though he had a lot more positive happen than last week. Fuller had himself a mixed bag of a game as well, but his rookie status makes it much more forgiving. 
      So as we move forward and into the third preseason game where we're expected to get a much closer glimpse of the team's "is it real" factor, let's hope to see continued improvement from the players we need to play significant roles in this resurgence... that is, if it's real this time. 
       
       
       Click here for ES Exclusive Game Photos ~ courtsey of Spaceman Spiff





       
      EXCLUSIVE ES AUDIO CONTENT 
       
       
       
         
       
       
       
       
       
       
       
       

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pR0JEkT 21

Dallas Cowboy Jokes!

158 posts in this topic

A Dallas Cowboy fan, a Washinton Redskin fan and Julia Roberts were all sitting together on the subway when the lights went out, and the car went completely dark. In the darkness there was a kissing noise, and then the sound of a really loud slap! When the subway car’s lights came back on, Julia and the Redskin fan were sitting as if nothing happened, while the Cowboy fan was holding his slapped face! The Cowboy fan was thinking, "That Redskin fan must have kissed Julia, and she swung at him and missed, slapping me instead!" Meanwhile, Julia was thinking, "That Cowboy fan must have tried to kiss me, accidentally kissed the Redskin fan, and got slapped for it!" And the Redskin fan was thinking, "This is great! The next time the subway car’s lights go out, I'll make another kissing noise and slap the crap out of that Cowboy fan again!"

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ahhh...it's about that time of the season. one of my favorites below:

A woman in Dallas calls 911. When the officer answers the phone the woman is hysterical and tells the cop that a man has just broken into her home and she thinks he intends to rape her. The officer explain that they are just extremely busy at the moment and tells her "Just get the guy's jersey number and we'll get back to you."

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I'd improve that joke by saying "The officer explains that they'll be right there, and tell her "make sure you get the guys jersey number."

because the thought of 911 telling the girl "we're very busy right now," really leaves me feeling uncomfortable.

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There is a Redskins fan, a Giants fan, and a Cowboys fan that got caught drunk in Saudi Arabia, where it is highly illegal to consume alcohol. They are all sentenced to be whipped 200 times. Luckily the whipper was a football fan and seeing as they were too, he gave each of them one wish. The Giants fan was first, he asked if he could have a pillow tied to his back to make it hurt less. But the whip broke through the pillow after like 20 whips and the Giants fan was in extreme pain. The Cowboys fan saw what had happened, so he asked to have 2 pillows tied to his back, but the whip again broke through. Last was the Redskins fan. The whipper said "You are a redskins fan, the greatest team in the world, you are allowed 2 wishes!" So the Redskins fan thought for a minute. "For my first wish, i want to be whipped 1,000 times!" The whipper was confused. "For my second wish, tie the Cowboys fan to my back!!!"

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A first grade teacher explains to her class that she is a Dallas Cowboy fan. She asks her students to raise their hands if they, too, are Cowboy fans. Everyone in the class raises their hands except one little girl. The teacher looks at the little girl with surprise and says, "Jenny, why didn't you raise your hand?" Jenny replied, "Because I'm not a Cowboy fan!" The still shocked teacher asked, "Well, if you aren't a Cowboy fan, then who are you a fan of?" Jenny answered, "I'm a Redskin fan and proud of it!" The teacher couldn't believe her ears. "Jenny, why in the world are you a Redskin fan?!" Jenny replied, "Because my mom is a Redskin fan, my dad is a Redskin fan, so I'm a Redskin fan, too!" The teacher answered in a slightly annoyed tone, "That is no reason for you to be a Redskin fan! You don't have to be just like your parents all of the time. What if your mom was a moron and your dad was a moron, what would you be then?!" Jenny smiled and said, "Then I'd be a Dallas Cowboy fan!"

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:laugh: There is Always one joke that kills me every time i hear it.....it is so funny! just scroll down to see it.

Its just one single word!! does anyone know what that word is??????

THEISMAN!!!!:laugh:

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Two guys from Dallas die and wake up in hell. The devil stops by to check on them and sees them dressed in coats, gloves and earmuffs, warming themselves around the fire. The devil asked them, "What are you two doing? Isn't it hot enough for you?!" The guys reply, "Well, you do realize that we're from Dallas, Texas. After our summers there, this is like a cold wave!" The devil decides that these two guys aren't miserable enough, so he cranks up the heat! The next day, the devil stops by again and there are the two guys again dressed in their coats, gloves and earmuffs. The devil asked them, "It's awfully hot down here! Can't you guys feel that?!" Again the guys answered, "Well, like we told you yesterday, we are from Dallas, Texas. We have suffered through the dog days of a Texas summer. This is like winter down here!" The devil gets really steamed and he decides to crank up the heat as high as it will go. People are wailing and screaming all over hell. However, when he stops by to check on the two men, he finds them in light jackets, grilling steaks and drinking beer! The devil couldn't believe his eyes. "Everyone down here is in absolute misery! You two seem to be enjoying yourselves!" The two men reply, "Well, as you know, we are from Dallas, Texas. This weather is like a fall morning during football season! So we thought we would have a little tailgate party!" The devil is so mad that he can't see straight! He decides that if the heat doesn't bother these two guys, he will go in the opposite direction. He decides to shut all the heat off in hell! The next day, the temperature is below zero. Icicles are hanging everywhere. People are shivering so bad, they are unable to wail, moan or gnash their teeth! The devil smiled as he went to check on the two Texans. He finds them back in their coats, gloves and earmuffs. They were jumping up and down and cheering! The devil was dumbfounded. "I don't get it! When I turned the heat up, you were happy! Now it's freezing cold, and you are celebrating! What's wrong with you two?" The Texans looked at the devil in surprise. "Well, don't you know? If hell froze over, that must mean that the Cowboys must've got back to the Super Bowl!"

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yea because the redskins are much closer to the super bowl than the cowboys!!!!!!......lol .......that is ONE FUNNY JOKE!!!!!

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Bill Parcells, clearly upset about the Dallas Cowboy's losing record, decides to find out from Bill Belichick what his secret is. So, Parcells travels up to a Patriot practice and asks Belichick, Coach, how is it that your team is so good? What's your secret?

Belichick responds by calling Tom Brady over. Tom, who's your father's brother's nephew? Tom answers, Why coach, that's easy. It's me. Belichick turns to Parcells and says, That's the secret, Bill. A smart quarterback. You've got to have a smart quarterback.

Thinking he's finally got all the tools he needs, Parcells returns to Texas and the Cowboy work-out. He promptly calls over Drew Bledsoe. Bledsoe! Who's your father's brother's nephew? Drew looks perplexed, thinks a minute and says, Coach, can I get back to you after practice on that one? Parcells (disgusted) says, OK.

During practice, Bledsoe calls over Julius Jones. Julius, coach just asked me the weirdest question. Who's your father's brother's nephew? Jones: Duh! That's easy. It's me! After practice, Bledsoe catches up with Parcells: Coach, I think I've got it. My father's brother's nephew is Julius Jones. Parcells (angry): No, No, NO! You idiot!! It's Tom Brady!!!

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A body was found naked here the other day, and when the coroner arrived to examine the body. The police officer said to him “you’re not going to believe this one”. The coroner began his exam, he noticed an Eagles cap over the victim’s left breast, he lifted it up, jotted a few words on his legal pad and continued his exam. He then noticed a Redskin’s cap over the right breast of the victim he again looked under it and jotted a few more notes on his legal pad. Then the police officer said to him”what do you make of this”…pointing to a Cowboys hat covering the victim’s crotch. The coroner lifted it up, shook his for a few seconds then lifted it up again for a second look, about this time the police officer ask “what’s the problem” The coroner said I’m use to seeing A#@holes under Cowboy hats!

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A boy is wallking near Fed Ex Field when he sees a man being attacked by a viscious dog. He finds a stick and charges the dog without any fear. He gets to the dog, slips the stick through the collar and twists really hard, breaking the dog’s neck and saving the man’s life. A news reporter for the Washington Post was close by and witnessed the whole event. He rushes over to the hero and tells him he wants to put this in the paper with the head line: “Redskins Fan Saves Man from Imminent Death”

The boy replies “I am not a Redskins fan.” Perplexed, the reporter asks “what kind of fan are you?” The boy replies “ A Cowboy fan!” The reporter decides on another headline: "Ignorant Redneck Ba$tard Kills Family Pet.”

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Rocky21 that was a good one I loved it...hahahaha....lol! :thumbsup: if you got anymore go ahead and post them. That sh.. was hilarious I had to tell my wife! She laughed so hard that she farted it was nasty!

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Rocky21 that was a good one I loved it...hahahaha....lol! :thumbsup: if you got anymore go ahead and post them. That sh.. was hilarious I had to tell my wife! She laughed so hard that she farted it was nasty!

Telling a joke that makes Queen Leo fart is the ultimate compliment.

Thank you. :D

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Albert Einstein arrives at a party and introduces himself to the first person he sees and asks, "What is your IQ?" to which the man answers,"241." "That is wonderful!," says Albert. "We will talk out the Grand Unification Theory and the mysteries of the Universe. We will have much to discuss!"

Next Albert introduces himself to a woman and asks, "What is your IQ?", to which the lady answers, "144." "That is great!," responds Albert."We can discuss politics and current affairs. We will have much to discuss!"

Albert goes to another person and asks, "What is your IQ?" to which the man answers, "51." Albert responds, "How 'bout them Cowboys?"

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There's a guy from Washington, DC (Redskins fan) driving from DC to Dallas, and a guy from Dallas (Cowboys fan) driving from Dallas to DC. In the middle of the night with no other cars on the road they hit each other head on and both cars go flying off in different directions. The Redskins fan manages to climb out of his car and survey the damage. He looks at his twisted car and says, "Man, I am really lucky to be alive!"

Likewise the Cowboys fan scrambles out of his car and looks at the wreckage. He too says to himself, "I can't believe I survived this wreck!" The Cowboy fan walks over to the Redskin and says, "Hey man, I think this is a sign from God that we should put away our differences and live as friends instead of arch rivals. The Redskin fan thinks for a moment and says, " You know, you're absolutely right! We should be friends. Now I'm going to see what else survived this wreck."

So the Redskins fan pops open his trunk and finds a full unopened bottle of Jack Daniels. He says to the Cowboys fan, "I think this is another sign from God that we should toast to our newfound understanding and friendship."

The Cowboys fan says, "You're damn right!" and grabs the bottle and starts sucking down Jack Daniels. After putting away nearly half of the bottle the Cowboys fan hands it back to the Redskins fan and says, "Your turn!"

The Redskins fan twists the cap back on the bottle and says, "Nahh, I think I'll wait for the cops to show up."

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So a blind man goes into a bar, he orders a drink, and after a while of sitting in the silence he leans over to the bartender and says "Hey, would you like to hear a Dallas Cowboy joke?"

Unbeknownst to the blind man he's actually in a Cowboys themed bar! The man next to him goes "Fella, before you tell that joke you ought to know that the bartender is a Cowboys fan, the bouncer is a Cowboys fan, and I'm a 6-5 260 Cowboys fan... what's more is that the man on your right is a Cowboys fan with a black belt in karate and the man to my left is a Cowboys fan who's a pro wrestler... so think about it real carefully fella, you still wanna tell that Cowboys joke?"

The blind man says:

"No, not if I'm going to have to explain it 5 times."

There are more on the next page!

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I hate to tell this one, being a Skins fan, but:

How do you keep a Redskin from masturbating?

Paint a star on its d*** and it won't beat it for years!!!

To atone for posting this.......... :dallasuck

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I'm a Skins fan as well, but I think this is so accurate:

What do the Redskins and Billy Graham have in common?

They can both make 90,000 people come together and yell "JESUS CHRIST!"

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That was funny for a Redskin joke :thumbsup: , I havent heard that one before. Nice one Hail2skins! The more you think about it, its pretty much true..lol! I always need to remember that one so I can tell my feinds!

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Q: How do you keep the Redskins out of your front yard?

A: Paint a goal line across it. :(

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haha..let me see if i can make some up at the moment......

Redskins Vs Cowboys....okay, cowboys got homefield advantage...

Q: what do u call a cowboy getting tackled upside down at mid field?

A: wishing upon a star for this victory...

Q: why did micheal irvin smoke crack?

A: cause he hung around lawrence taylor a little too much when kfc was close....

Q: shortly after the career ending hit by lavar, how did troy aikman respond as he awoke? ...

A: "Hey guys am i in the huddle already, i see stars everywhere."..

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There was a Frenchman, a Mexican, a Redskin fan, and a Cowboy fan sitting up on a hill getting drunk. The Frenchman tilts up his bottle of Champagne till empty, throws the bottle in the air, shoots it with his pistol, and yells

"Viva La France".

Just after that the Mexican finishes his bottle of Tequilla, throws it in the air, fires his pistol, and shouts "Viva La Mexico"

Just about that time the Redskin fan finishes his Budwieser, tosses the can on the ground, pulls his gun and shoots the Cowboys fan, and then says calmly "IT DOESN'T GET ANY BETTER THAN THIS"

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